The Mitsubishi 3000GT VR4 Twin Turbo is absolutely a fascinating car. Rare, too! A car way ahead of its time, full of advanced electronics and four-wheel steering and two whole turbos. It’s amazing! Is such a remarkable car worth $500,000? Only if it has an original Banksy in the trunk, or you’re as deluded as this Detroit-area Craigslister.

Yes, that’s right, not all the crazy people on Craigslist are trying to get you to slide your finger inside their USB (Underwear Section, Bodily) ports while reciting White Zombie lyrics; some of them are trying to sell complicated Japanese GT cars made by America’s bargainiest basementest brand for half a million dollars.

Somehow, the owner of this admittedly extremely well-sorted 1998 Mitsubishi 3000GT VR4 was able to see well enough through his eye-pinwheels to type this ad:

RARE CARACAS RED 1998 Mitsubishi 3000GT VR-4 Twin Turbo All VIN TAGS, All Wheel Drive, All Wheel Steering, 6 Speed Getrag Manual for sale.

Maintained with Mitsubishi OEM Only!

All Scheduled Maintenance.

Stored inside on battery tender.

Forum member owned

First owner was an Oracle programmer.

Second owner owns a Tech Startup.

Only 2 owners of this nearly 20 year old Classic Japan Turbo Legends of the 90s.

MSRP $45,750 in 1998.

RARE Less than 190 are known to exist.

No Test Drive Policy.

Factory Spoiler=$5,000

OEM Factory 18s Rims=$10,000

Like New Tan Leather Interior=$15,000

Engine and Transmission=$25,000

Wiring Harness=$5,000

Braking System=$5,000

Speedometer=$1,500

Trim Panels=$5,000

$70k+ PARTS

We Reserve the Right to Refuse or Deny anyone at anytime for any reason. We also reserve the right to sell the vehicle Internationally or Locally which ever happens first.

VEHICLE AVAILABILITY NOT GUARANTEED CALL NOW 810-441-4599

...

All VINS NO STORIES

GREEN TITLE

$500,000 FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS

I especially like how the ad copy ends with “$500,000 FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS” because deep down the seller has to know that after your wipe your monitor free from all the beer/coffee/Yoo-Hoo you just spit-took all over it, your first question will be “did he just say five hundred thousand dollars?”

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It’s not clear exactly what this person must be smoking, but whatever it is I bet it also has a secondary use helping horses get loose and sexy at horse discos. The car is very likely one of the best examples of it’s kind out there, but that in no way justifies the insane price.

The seller’s math about what he put into the car seems equally inflated. Do speedos for this thing really cost $1,500? Are those wheels really $10,000? Trim panels are five grand? What the hell are they made of? Pressed saffron?

So, $500,000 for a car that, from 20 feet away, looks basically like car worth about $4000. Seems about right.

I really like some of the “pedigree” cited in the ad, too. Stored on a battery tender! Owned by a forum member! They don’t just let anyone log on to those things! You need a computer, and a connection to the global computer network.

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Also, it was owned by an Oracle programmer? Holy shit, what if it was one of the people who worked on the NetBeans IDE? And then the second owner owned a tech startup? It could have been the Flooz guy!

$500,000 for a Mitsubishi most likely worth, oh, 1/15th of that, if I’m being generous? There’s nothing that says “I’m crazy fucking rich” more than vastly overpaying for something.

It’s like a $75 hamburger—something only the truly, truly rich would consider. So, by that logic, this half-mil Mitsubishi with the Craigslist ad silkscreened on the hood should be more impressive to people than some candy-ass Bugatti Veyron.

Better email quick, rich people!