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New York’s Garbage Subway Now Adds Filth-Waterfall

New York’s subway was a modern marvel 100 years ago, but these days it has become a disgusting choose-your-own-adventure of unfortunate experiences. Today’s chapter includes an downpour of rank city water on to hapless riders waiting for a train near Bryant Park in Manhattan’s Garment District.


Is everyone cringing inside yet at the thought of a giant underground subway swimming pool soup made up of 113 years of pee, garbage, rat carcasses, dirt, more pee, other bodily fluids and more disgusting subway things? And also, PEE? I want to die.


“Literal health hazard” is just today’s edition of Why The Subway Is A Horrifying, Crumbling Mess. It’s been derailing, delaying, hitting walls and ensnaring passengers in pitch-black sweaty nightmarish hell — all just in these past few months. In fact, just last night a New Jersey transit train carrying 180 passengers derailed at Penn Station.

Luckily, the state government is working tirelessly, day and night, to try and solve—lol jk no it’s not because that would be too easy. After a very long period of doing nothing, Gov. Andrew Cuomo finally declared a state of emergency on the Metro Transit Authority and promised he would commit an extra $1 billion to help fix it.


Except, no he won’t, because he suggested scaling back subway repairs to fund his pet projects like a third Long Island Rail Road track for him to have ample space on the road back from his vacation home.

The MTA? They’re also not saying anything, probably because they don’t even ride the subway.


People have been lobbying Cuomo for years to fix the subway, and there was even a protest outside of the governor’s NYC office last month demanding he do or say something useful please dear God.


But because of Cuomo’s rather fragile ego he couldn’t get past the fact people were “tweeting nasty things” about him rather than do his job and listen to his constituents.


Cuomo sucks (being from Michigan and knowing a thing or two about sucky governors, I can say that with authority), the subway sucks, no one is doing anything and now there’s a waterfall.

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So are the subways getting worse and worse every day, or are you all just burried in shit-subway content and writing articles on it as fast as you can?

In a weird backwards universe, I rode the LA subway over the weekend, and it was quite pleasant and reasonably clean, plus I had a slice of pizza that didn’t taste like marinaded goat assholes, so that’s 2 for LA and 0 of NYC.