Cracked has taken the time to dump on car dealers and basically the entire process of buying a new car because, hey, it kinda sucks. Here’s what your local dealer’s commercials might look like if they were “honest,” had better lighting, and Steve Buscemi’s stunt double(?) as a spokesman.

It’s a “funny because it’s true” kind of thing, and “sad because... it’s true.” Though I’m sure a handful of you will rise to the defense of our nation’s illustrious car dealerships. Where else would we go to get our imported economy cars serviced?

Will they be able to sneak a penis joke in there? Stick through to 02:40 to find out! Also, yes. They will.


Contact the author at andrew@jalopnik.com.