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I Fit A Folding Table And Chair In A Miata, So Crossovers Are Officially Canceled

Who needs space when you can just make 17 runs to Target?

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Image for article titled I Fit A Folding Table And Chair In A Miata, So Crossovers Are Officially Canceled
Image: Mazda

As some of you know, I recently moved to Detroit. And yes, my new apartment is right on Woodward Avenue. I didn’t do that on purpose, though. This building was the only one that responded to my request for a tour, so here I am. A Woodard on Woodward.

Unfortunately, thanks to the disaster that is the current supply chain (thanks, COVID), my furniture won’t get here until later in the month. Add onto that a few things got lost in the move and the last of my boxes won’t get here until later in the week.


So at least for now, I live like a 19-year-old. A 19-year-old with a great view of an incorrectly named street, but a 19-year-old nonetheless. It’s kind of like camping, except I don’t have to worry about bears, and going camping doesn’t make you undateable.

But don’t worry. I’m fine. I’m FINE.

As much as I hate buying things twice, I quickly realized I at least needed something to sit on other than my mattress. Typically, when you need something, you go to the store and buy it. And even though my furniture is taking forever, there are still plenty of stores that have furniture. Clearly, the solution was to pick up some temporary pieces to make my life a little more comfortable.


The problem was, my press car for the week was a Mazda Miata RF, a car not exactly known for its cargo capacity. When I put a carry-on in the trunk, I had to put my backpack in the passenger seat. Even with the roof down, the odds of me being able to use it to haul furniture were low. So low I actually wished I had a crossover.

My back hurt too much to spend another day on my mattress, though, so off to Target I went in search of anything that might work. And you know what? I found it. I am, in fact, typing this blog right now on the table and chair that I brought home in the Miata. Glorious!

Image for article titled I Fit A Folding Table And Chair In A Miata, So Crossovers Are Officially Canceled
Photo: Collin Woodard

Sadly, I didn’t think to take a picture at the time, but that’s partly because it wasn’t all that ridiculous. I just opened the door, and they fit right in. No putting the roof down. No finagling. No fuss. It wouldn’t have been an interesting picture.


Obviously, there was no room for a passenger, but I’m a 32-year-old man who (TEMPORARILY) sleeps on a mattress on his floor. It’ll be a while before I have to worry about passengers. As a person who didn’t previously have a chair, I was much more worried about that chair.

What I do have is a picture of one of my next trips, this time for kitchen supplies. My furniture situation might be very college sophomore-y, but at least I refuse to eat like one.


Did I get stopped in the parking lot by a woman who was worried it might not all fit? Yes, I did. But fit it all in, I did.

See? There was no reason to wish I’d had a crossover. All I needed to do to get what I needed was make several trips to multiple Targets, fight an actual college sophomore for the one remaining folding chair, hunt through the dorm section for a small enough table, sacrifice my dignity, worry a kind stranger, and waste a lot of gas. Easy.


Now that I’ve succeeded in this very specific and not-at-all universally applicable situation, I can finally declare that crossovers are canceled. You don’t need one. You just need a Miata.