How Jalop Is Your Car? Take Our Experimental Quiz!

Illustration for article titled How Jalop Is Your Car? Take Our Experimental Quiz!

Way way back in 2008 — a magical time of fauxhawks and purity rings — we had a How Jalopnik Is Your Car quiz. And we want to update it and bring it back, with exciting new technology! And we did! Sort of. I'll explain.


As we mentioned before, we've been testing out some new quiz technology for the Jalopnik Mainframe (located in the cargo hold of El Debarge's Meditation Yacht) and while I think it's performed well before, the often subjective and highly complex task of determining the jalopy level of a car may be too much for it.

In my testing so far, I'm finding that it's giving lower scores than it should for certain cars. I think it's because the multiple-choice method doesn't allow for proper weighting of certain answers like other algorithms would, but I tried to compensate. I'm not sure it's successful.

So, let's give it a test, why not? Run your car, cars you want, cars you hate, cars you made up through the quiz and let's see what sort of results we get. This may be a total failure. It may work. We just need to find out.

Anyway, it'll be fun, right? Right? Just don't be offended when it says your Merkur XR4Ti is only like 20% Jalop. Matt, I said I'm sorry. It's the quiz, not me! Baby, be reasonable!


UPDATE: Yeah, this is pretty seriously borked with some hilarious results. Go ahead and take the quiz and let us know what you got but, yeah, it's going to be fairly random.



Result: 1-5% Jalop.