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Honda's Freed Active Probably Escaped From 1995's Hackers Film

Illustration for article titled Hondas Freed Active Probably Escaped From 1995s Hackers Film

Do you need to transport eight of your closest hacker buddies to the nearest totally “underground” techno rave in the deep warrens of the city’s industrial district? Do you still live in the mid-90s? Do you love glow sticks a little bit too much? Well, just for you, Honda introduces the Freed Active!

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Illustration for article titled Hondas Freed Active Probably Escaped From 1995s Hackers Film
Illustration for article titled Hondas Freed Active Probably Escaped From 1995s Hackers Film
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Behold that modern matte periwinkle finish! Observe, closely, the lime green laser (LAAAAZZZZZER) accents of the grill, the sides, the city lights, and the fog lights!

Illustration for article titled Hondas Freed Active Probably Escaped From 1995s Hackers Film

Be impressed with all the cargo capacity you could possibly desire for cases upon cases of Mountain Dew and Jolt Cola and/or enough space for rolling your ass off sexy times!

Illustration for article titled Hondas Freed Active Probably Escaped From 1995s Hackers Film
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Enjoy the vaguely evil robotic looking rear end, sure to frighten the senior citizens who have pulled up too close to you at 8 p.m. on some idle Tuesday in their 1988 Buick LeSabre!

Illustration for article titled Hondas Freed Active Probably Escaped From 1995s Hackers Film
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Become mesmerized by the alloy wheels that remind you of that neon Hot Wheels set you got at Christmas in 1992!

Illustration for article titled Hondas Freed Active Probably Escaped From 1995s Hackers Film
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Wonder at the... at the... at... whatever the hell this is!

Illustration for article titled Hondas Freed Active Probably Escaped From 1995s Hackers Film
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Illustration for article titled Hondas Freed Active Probably Escaped From 1995s Hackers Film

Marvel at the most legit righteous interior, am I right? Those seats are clearly totally excellent for some hacking of the Gibson while listening to Prodigy over and over at insane volumes!

Now, excuse me while I go sob in the corner as I try to atone for my teenaged love of this awful, awful movie and reconsider my adoration of Honda because of this dark light, bio luminescent mechanical land whale.

Previously Correspondent, Asia at Jalopnik and LGBT Editor at Jezebel. Lover of the Oxford Comma, despite AP Style, and the Commonwealth "S." Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/nippolitica

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DISCUSSION

a_pink_poodle
a_pink_poodle

Hack the mainframe on this Powerbook 190 and PCP Packet those electronic mail letters through the world wide web information superhighway!