I’m not saying looking cool is the best thing about riding motorcycles, but “bad ass” never goes out of style. If you spend a lot of time really riding, you’ll come to realize that safety and being seen is a lot more important than swagger. And if you can’t make it, fake it.

If you have a friend, relative or enemy who’d rather just wax their coats and beards than actually ride, I think we found the perfect set of accessories for ’em.

A Fancy-Ass Beltstaff Jacket

High-quality armored weather-resistant motorcycle clothing costs a lot of money. Turns out, you can spend just as much and get none of the protective properties but so much more dashing handsomeness.

I wish I were cool enough to pull something like this off, but the truth is I’d just look like I was heading to a Halloween party in this. I bet a really, really, ridiculously good-looking person would fill this thing out something fierce, though.

A Much Cheaper Rakish Jacket

If your friends don’t care about brand names, or they’re not good-enough of friends to be worth spending $500 on, you can always go with a lower-spec version of the urban rogue look.

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Any jacket with that super-high tight button collar will pretty much get the job done.

Sleeveless Harley Shirt

There are plenty of motorcyclist looks out there besides “pompous vintage Sunday rider,” and I guess the polar opposite of that would be a true classic.

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A sleeveless Harley shirt is as macho or hipster as you want to make it, depending on how much irony you feel like wearing it with.

War Boy Goggles

You know you’ve been looking for an excuse to buy some of these since Fury Road came out. Or maybe you forgot about them altogether.

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Regardless, these will look cool on your forehead or around your neck whether you’re buzzing up on a bike or not.

Tacticool Purse

Don’t laugh. Okay, you can giggle. But little side-mounted satchels are actually really useful when you’re riding because pants pockets always get restricted and backpacks are a pain in the butt to reach.

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It might be a harder sell for your non-riding friends, but just remind them that Indiana Jones wears one.

Deus Hat

Deus Ex Machina is a coffee shop on Venice Boulevard that’s made to look like a motorcycle shop. If the company has earnest roots in motorcycle repair or customization, I’m sure someone will quickly inform us in the comments.

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But as far as I know, the place now specializes in expensive beverages and clothing. Sometimes they have some cool vehicles parked out front. Even if you’re not into bikes, the coffee there’s really good.

Vintage Patch

I’m on a quest to bring patches back into fashion. Come on, guys. Let’s start sewing colorful shit onto our jackets and backpacks again.

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In the motorcycle and non-motorcycle-but-I-wish-I-was-motorcycle world, there’s no school like old school and I’m sure anybody would cherish a retro patch like this even if they don’t end up attaching it to their clothing.