For $42,000, Plymouth Rock The Vote

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While it's been famously averred that all politics is local, today's Nice Price or Crack Pipe Tea Party themed Prowler is pretty much all loco. It may not be your cup of you know what, but will its price get your vote?

For many who live outside of the US, our political process may seem less serious and more spurious as each of our two major parties attempts ever nuttier ways to buy the largest vote sway constituents. As an American, let me assure you, it's even more batshitcrazypants than you can imagine.

As part of the insanity, campaigns typically employ various innovative methods of cutting through the clutter to get their message across - buying Twitter tags, selective editing of competitor's speeches, even skywriting - and apparently as part of this election cycle, this is now a thing.


Even if you don't live under the Stars and Stripes, you've surely heard about the Tea Party by now. And being here on Jalopnik, you are most assuredly familiar with the late Plymouth Prowler. Made possible through the magic of 3M™ Scotchlite™ Reflective Material, today's candidate is a unique and unsubtle melding of the two.


Although this particular car is a rolling advertisement for the Romney-Ryan ticket, the Prowler makes a particularly appropriate metaphor for either political party as it was a product that in many ways promised things that it was unable to fulfill. The Prowler looks like a hot rod, and hot rods are typically powered by ass-kicking V8s. However, popping the 1999 Prowler's pointy hood reveals a 3.5-litre V6 bringing only 253-bhp to the party. Earlier cars had an even more anemic 214 ponies.


The Prowler's wild shape also portended a lack of cargo capacity and that was one campaign promise it easily kept having little more space in its trunk than for its folding top. This 42,000-mile Prowler makes up for its capacity shortcomings with a red, white and blue body wrap that looks like something Captain America coughed up. Remarkably durable, that 3M™ wrap should last for years at least. Or, if the Tea Party's over, it's not too tough to remove.

Not only does the wrap proudly communicate its owner's political leanings but the twin buckets set into the massive front bumper rams allow for even more expressions of patriotism via tiny American flags. And to top it off, the whole thing sort of glows in the dark.


Look, I know that some of you are left-leaning, and likely are now scraping the vomit off your screen, while others are so right-wing that you're wiping another bodily fluid off it, (eww!), but we just need to put our partisan differences aside. This is a unique icon of America's current political cycle, and as such it perhaps will be of value to future historians, and hence might be of investment value.


That investment presently means a $42,000 contribution to the present owner's bank account. What do you think, is this Tea Party Prowler worth teeing up that much cash? Or, does that price make this Prowler a tea potty?

You decide!


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