For $1,600, Cop A Deal

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Today's Nice Price or Crack Pipe Crown Vic finally gives you the opportunity to check out the view from the front of a police car instead of the back. Will its price however, still prove criminal?

Back in the '60s, Abbie Hoffman was a left-wing radical who advocated civil unrest, drug use, the breakdown of traditional American values, and jewfros. Back then he was described by his detractors as a filthy hippie, while were he alive today, those on the right would describe him as the model of the Democratic base.

I bring up Abbie because while his era-encapsulating book - defiantly titled Steal This Book - contained instruction on everything a radical would need to shake things up - such as how to make a pipe bomb, or ways to start a commune - it also had a section on how to get stuff for practically nothing, which included leveraging federal disbursement programs and government surplus.


This exploitation of the very institutions he sought to bring down - what he called the "Pig Empire" - resulted in ways to obtain everything from a free buffalo to stuff you could actually use - like a car. Our candidate today is not being sold by the Government, but is a former civil service asset and as a former police vehicle stands as an icon of everything abhorred by Hoffman and his bathing-averse followers.

But not by us, we love the P71 Crown Vic, and we'll soon find out if we also love the price on this hail-damaged 2005 Crown Vic Interceptor. Rocking 130,000 miles on its certified odometer, and a golf ball motif on its utility white paint - thanks apparently to one of those freak hail storms of which insurance companies seem unwilling to acknowledge - the car is claimed to otherwise run without issue. As you may recall, Mythbusters did an episode where they found this kind of dimpling added to an automobile's operating efficiency, so maybe the denting is on the whole a plus.


Under the hood is Ford's P71-pumped up 250-bhp edition of the 4.6-litre modular V8. Much of the increased power comes from the P71's adoption of a bigger 80 mm MAF allowing it to gulp air like a night shifter downs coffee. Bolted to the crazy eight is Ford's stout 4R75W 4-speed automatic, which is directed via a column shifter despite the cop's-ass wide buckets leaving plenty of room on the tunnel.

That space in the interior is typically ocupado by a cop's tools of the trade, but here is a blank canvas. Still in residence is an a-pillar mounted spot, and vinyl bench in back to ensure easy clean up of perp-spiration and other nastiness.


The seller claims his price to be "ridiculously low" and at $1,600 that is certainly open to general debate. It's now time for you to vote on just how ridiculous that might be. What do you think, does $1,600 for this Interceptor have you P71ing in your pants? Or, do you find that price to be grand theft auto?

You decide!


St. Louis Craigslist or go here if the ad disappears.

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