Fifteen Mysterious Cars Pulled From Detroit River

Illustration for article titled Fifteen Mysterious Cars Pulled From Detroit River

Police don't know how or why fifteen cars were in the Detroit river, but they pulled them out the other day. Among the recovered was a Celica, Capri, a couple Fords and a 50s-era Buick.


Fifteen cars don't "end up on the bottom of the Detroit river" if you know what we mean, so the discovery has raised eyebrows in the law enforcement community. Now that the cars are top side they'll be inspected to determine if they were involved in past crimes, but considering that Buick had a ten inch mud puppy living in it, they're probably going to have a hard time collecting a lot of forensics.

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A lot of pot holes in the detroit, and a lot of problems are buried sunk in those holes rivers. But you gotta do it right. I mean, you gotta have the spot picked out before you show up with the car and the package in the trunk. Otherwise, you're talking about a half-hour to forty-five minutes worth of sinking cars in areas of the river you didn't use. And who knows who's gonna come along in that time? Pretty soon, you gotta sink more cars. You could be there all fuckin' night.