COTD: Bumper cars with Harry edition

Illustration for article titled COTD: Bumper cars with Harry edition

When Harry Truman bought his 1953 Chrysler New Yorker, it had been nearly eight years since he'd driven anywhere, which is why its not surprising he played a little bumper tune pulling out of the dealership, saying "The car has so many gadgets, I'll have to go to engineering school to learn how to handle it." But would it have been better with the feline-based warning system fastmov4 created inspired by the roadgoing tigers of Dubai?


From the brilliant minds that brought you the Trunk Monkey comes...


When fellow drivers assault your ears and eyes with threats of bodily harm and disfigurement, simply press the patented steering-wheel mounted button to activate the Traffic Tiger's Stage 1 Audible Response *RAAWWRRR*. If the offending commuter fails to heed the warning, simply press the button again to activate Traffic Tiger's Stage 2* Vehicular Transfer-Attack response, and Traffic Tiger's integral launch system will propel him into the lap of your target. This should change the tone of the exchange almost immediately. To retrieve Traffic Tiger after activating Stage 2, simply pull off to the side of the road and allow approximately 30 minutes for Traffic Tiger to finish his meal.

*note that Stage 2 can be "Short-Shift"-activated by pressing the button twice in rapid succession

TRAFFIC TIGER - for when you're done monkeying around with road rage.

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Congratulations, Mr. fastmov4, on COTD today! I would like to gift you with this shiny Chrysler SRT which will be brought to you very soon by this lovely shiny lady.