If BMW could, it wouldn't allow this video to play before tattoing the inside of your retinas with "DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME." Which begs the question of why they asked stuntbike champion Chris Pfeiffer how to surf a motorcycle in the first place. It ain't easy, as Irishman noted in our story about the skill of certain bikecops:

Three years ago I took my kids to one of the larger local parks, got to the driveway of the parking area near their favorite playground and it was closed off with highway signs. So we parked down the road a bit and walked back.

Turns out it was closed because the PD was using the lot for a training day for brand new motorcycle cops. The kids ran to the empty playground and I just sat on a bench and watched.

There were twelve trainees on twelve beat-up older cruisers going around cones, plus three instructors yelling at them like funny drill sergeants, calling them names and laughing. Buncha newbies, some of whom obviously had sport-bike habits, mashing cones, falling over, running into each other. They were all having a great time at it. So was I.

One exercise they did was to go down a path of cones and do two loops around a single cone without hitting the outer ring of cones, then back out the path. One guy got stuck, couldn't come out of it, went around 6 times and suddenly puked over his outside shoulder. When he turned his head to hurl, his throttle hand moved and the bike sped up, tried to do one more loop, then high-sided him all the way out of the ring of cones.

I shall never forget the way the stream of vomit looped and hung in the air a moment before falling.

Best park day ever. The kiddos played for two hours with all the stuff to themselves, and I got laughs. Lotsandlots of laughs.