For the record, I actually kind of like the crazy Nissan Teatro for Dayz Concept. And while I don’t like the idea, I also accept that a “smartphone on wheels” is probably what mainstream buyers want, even if they don’t admit it. But like Jason, I can’t get over the grating, pandering marketing bullshit language Nissan is using to hype it up.

If someone ever says “share native” to you in real life, and they mean it sincerely, you have Official Jalopnik Permission to slap them. Not with a closed fist and not that hard, but enough to get the point across.

Obviously Jason and I aren’t the only ones who feel this way, because reader ovhjo described his feelings with the art of poetry:

I am a Millennial

I studied and am employed in Marketing, allow me to marketing fluff-up my sentiments on this heap:

I do not want seats made of glass

I do not want them on my ass

I do not want touch screen fenders

I do not want $10k rear enders

I do not want to always “share”

About this car, I do not care

I do want an affordable car

I do want to spend less to go quite far

I do want a car that’s fun to drive

I do want a car that feels alive

I do want a that’s safe and sound

With wheels that are firmly grounded to the ground.

This car is bullshit for days

Bravissimo!


Contact the author at patrick@jalopnik.com.