Carlos Ghosn addressed the media today, the first time since he got whacked, axed, imprisoned. Also since he escaped. I had hoped that Ghosn would name names, and call out exactly the people involved in conspiring to lock him up. But Ghosn had more important things to discuss: the adoration of his loving fans, and the time GM offered to double his salary to poach him.

Ghosn spoke to the assembled media in Beirut (the entirety of which can be seen here on Bloomberg’s Twitter), where he fled from Japan in an almost-unbelievable escape. He immediately put his foot in his mouth:

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While we may think we are currently in an era of a new Ghosn, a Ghosn that pulls off such daring escapes as hiding in a large box, we may not have yet fully left the previous Ghosn phase, which was attempting a disguise as a worker and getting caught incredibly easily.

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Ghosn took some time in his press meeting to chastise current Nissan operations for missing out on a merger with Fiat-Chrysler, and also that he was offered double pay to join GM. “I made a mistake, I should have accepted the offer,” he said, per the transcripted Reuters highlights.

This is what I would call “industry exciting” rather than “actually exciting.” I had hoped for more from a guy just put on Interpol’s most wanted list. I wanted Ghosn to call out those who wronged him, and I wanted him to implicate everyone from Shinzō Abe down.

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But he didn’t. He played himself as a martyr. He claimed he was worried he would die in Japan. Ghosn, 65, faced up to 15 years in jail if sentenced.

Ghosn’s remarks were also, I hate to say, kind of what you expect from a CEO: a grandiose and self-centered view of the world where the CEO is wanted and beloved universally. The CEO is at the top. Every hand reaches up to you.

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Ghosn doubled down on it, saying just before a short break for the assembled press to gather themselves, that the media smeared him in Japan, claiming he didn’t love it there. He did love it there, and described taking walks in Japan, going to restaurants and to the movies, unattended. He claimed, in these unattended walks (and thus with no witnesses, I’ll point out), that people came up to him and told them how much they appreciated him, personally.

His handlers cut him off, and went to the break.

Raphael Orlove is features editor for Jalopnik.

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