Photo: Car Gurus
Nice Price Or Crack PipeIs this used car a good deal? You decide!  

Today’s Nice Price or Crack Pipe Chevy has been dubbed the DinoSSauR for reasons that are pretty obvious. Let’s see if the price on this custom restomod proves to be a deal, or an extinction level event.

Do you think that future generations will show the same level of fondness for crossovers as many right-thinking folks do today for traditional station wagons, estates, Avants, and quirky Combis?

I guess that will depend on what other options the future has in store. If futurity holds nothing more than Bird scooters, shared bicycles, and not-so rapid transit buses, then yeah, I think a few folks would feel wistful every time a Chevy Traverse or Kia Sorento shambles by.

That of course, is for future generations to sort out, among a slew of other problems they will be saddled with. Ha, sucks to be you, future unborn!

We on the other hand, like us some wagons. Not only did we like yesterday’s 2000 Saab 9-5 longroof, but we also liked its seemingly decent presentation and modest $2,750 price. It’s present owner may have been looking to trade it for a truck, but fully 78-percent of you felt it a fair deal to trade those dollars for it, giving the Saab a respectable Nice Price win.

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That Saab’s seller’s lament that what he really needed was a pickup makes one wonder—does he need one for utility, or as an accoutrement to his own personal style and expression, a la Urban Cowboy?

If it’s the latter then maybe he should take a look at this uniquely customized 2005 Chevy SSR, DinoSSauR. Equally intriguing and nightmare inducing, this truck takes automotive anthropomorphism to new and, perhaps unwarranted levels. Sure it’s crazy, but who wouldn’t want to drive a dinosaur, a la Fred Flintstone?

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When introduced, the SSR was already an outlier in Chevy’s lineup. Built on a frame derived from the Chevy Trailblazer, the SSR featured a retractible hardtop cab and a hard tonneau over a less than utilitarian bed. The nose is what really made the SSR however. It was a modern riff on Chevy’s Advanced Design style from the late 1940s and early ‘50s, and still looks pretty cool today.

The bodywork was made from steel, requiring the re-adoption of some older production techniques in the creation of the sensuously curved hood and front fenders. Unlike other restomods from the era, the SSR talked the talk too, with initially a 5.3, and finally a 6-litre V8 engine and available Tremec T-56 6-speed transmission for its motivational speaking.

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Visually, this one throws out a lot of what made the SSR cool, and keeps the somewhat awkward bits in the middle. The nose is designed to look like some sort of angry alien, while out back there’s a serrated spoiler with a tail. Don’t follow too closely, Saturday bicycle trains!

The tail lamps have been frenched in, and the whole thing has been painted fly yellow. Sure, the style’s an acquired taste, but for what it is, it looks to have achieved the originator’s vision in a well crafted manner.

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Amazingly, it’s also even less functional than a standard SSR. The bed is almost completely filled with CO2 tanks, mounted in a carpeted box. Lines from those are apparently routed to the nostrils in the hood, and that allows for billows of white smoke to pour forth on an as-needed basis. The body mods are all fiberglass, so perhaps the truck’s not tipping the scales (see what I did there?) any more than the factory 4,750 pounds despite all the lizard baloney.

The seller notes that the truck was built as a parade car, but that it would make a great movie prop too, serving as either the ride of some reptile-based super hero, or the villain in a B-grade horror movie. Everything on the truck is said to work without issue, from the retractible top to the 395 horsepower LS2 V8 and 6-speed stick.

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Unlike the exterior, the interior lacks any additional mods outside of Chevy’s original old school theme. All surfaces seem intact, and with the exception of a red button atop the shifter (likely to spew the aforementioned nostril gas), it seems unmolested. The truck comes with the factory ‘Preferred Equipment Group’ which includes convenience and appearance features like a self-dipping mirror, Bose sound system, and, perhaps most importantly, a satin chrome engine cover insert.

It comes with a 3-owner history, a clear title, and just 7,400 miles on the clock. Geez, with so few miles, it’s almost as though people haven’t been exactly clamoring to get behind this custom’s four-spoke steering wheel.

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Would you drive the DinoSSauR? Of course you would, I mean it’s cool, right? The more important question however, is whether or not you would pay $29,988 to do so.

What do you think, is this reptilian SSR worth that kind of cash? Or, for that much does this re-wrestled restomod need to crawl back under a rock?

You decide!

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Car Gurus out of Spring, TX, or go here if the ad disappears.

H/T to itsalwayssteve for the hookup!

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