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At $25,000, Would You Enlist With This 2008 AM General M998 HMMWV?

Illustration for article titled At $25,000, Would You Enlist With This 2008 AM General M998 HMMWV?
Photo: Craigslist
Nice Price Or No DiceIs this used car a good deal? You decide!

You may not be going out much during our pandemic pandemonium. Once this is all over, however, you’ll want a truck like today’s Nice Price or Crack Pipe Humvee to take you to ALL the places you’ve been missing, no matter how remote. Let’s see what such potential freedom might just cost.

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So, yesterday’s weird Vipervette conglomeration of C4 Corvette and Dodge Viper kit car body only asked a mere $8,000. And you could probably get it for less seeing as it appears to have been sitting around for quite a while.

The irony of the car as a whole is that it obviously cost a good bit more than that to create, and with Viper prices plunging due to the general malaise in the collector car market, you could probably get a real asp-kicker for not much more than the cost of this one’s original build.

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That pretzel logic wasn’t lost on the majority of you, the result of which was the car falling in a massive 95 percent Crack Pipe loss.

I don’t know about you, but It’s hard to imagine there being anything that could have replaced something as iconic and historic a vehicle as the Jeep. I mean, it won WWII almost single wheeled-edly!

Still, there came a time when America’s military-industrial complex demanded a new general-purpose transport and that resulted in the AM General High Mobility Multipurpose Wheeled Vehicle or HMMWV. That “Humvee” didn’t replace just the Jeep. In fact, the original specifications laid down by the U.S. Army required a vehicle with enough flexibility in its design that it could replace pretty much all the light tactical vehicles the service needed to go about its job.

Illustration for article titled At $25,000, Would You Enlist With This 2008 AM General M998 HMMWV?
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One configuration of the resulting Humvee was that of a soft-top four-door with an open bed in the back. For those of you keeping score, that’s the same configuration available today on the Jeep Gladiator. To that, I say, feh! We’re not here to talk Jeeps, we’re here to see just what it might cost to get a good Hummer.

Illustration for article titled At $25,000, Would You Enlist With This 2008 AM General M998 HMMWV?
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Today’s M998 HMMWV is said to have done service with the West Virginia National Guard and following that was rebuilt to original specs by the United States of America back in 2008. It’s painted in Chemical Agent Resistant Coating (CARC) camouflage paint and carries canvas doors and top in the same bushes and dirt color scheme. A similar cover for the rear section is included as well.

Illustration for article titled At $25,000, Would You Enlist With This 2008 AM General M998 HMMWV?
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The interior seats four is all green and looks as uncomfortable as hell. Still, that’s the price you pay for something that’s able to climb every mountain, ford every stream, and follow every rainbow until you find your every dream.

Making that all happen is a drivetrain comprised of a 190-horsepower 6.5-litre diesel V8 and three-speed TH400 automatic transmission. That combo directs power through three lockable differentials to independently-sprung portal axles on each corner. This Humvee wears Goodyear Wrangler tires with what’s claimed to be nearly full tread, although should you manage to flatten one of those you’re going to be SOL since the truck doesn’t seem to carry a spare.

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Illustration for article titled At $25,000, Would You Enlist With This 2008 AM General M998 HMMWV?

The aluminum chassis is said to be all solid as are the brush guards and all the soft bits. The ad also claims that the engine “runs flawlessly and starts when ice cold with one quick flip of the starting switch.” Make sure you let the glowplugs warm up first!

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There are currently 4,000 miles showing on the odometer and the seller says the truck will be delivered with both a clean title and get-out-of-jail-free card emissions test.

Illustration for article titled At $25,000, Would You Enlist With This 2008 AM General M998 HMMWV?
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There have been many celebrities who have owned Hummers over the years, perhaps most notably actor and one-time California govern-ator, Ah-nold Schwarzenegger. The former Austrian Oak favored custom Hummers, which obviously have their place in the world. For the rest of us though, I think a full-on military spec version is where it’s at, and where this one is at is $25,000.

What do you think, could this honorably discharged former National Guard HMMWV be worth that kind of cash? Or, is that too much for this tour of duty?

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You decide!

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Denver, CO Craigslist, or go here if the ad disappears.

Help me out with NPOCP. Hit me up at rob@jalopnik.com and send me a fixed-price tip. Remember to include your Kinja handle.

Rob Emslie is a contributing writer for Jalopnik. He has too many cars, and not enough time to work on them all.

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DISCUSSION

There’s no way in hell.

I think the automatic DoucheBags Unlimited membership that comes with it is the most offputting aspect of today’s offering, but there are others including but in no way limited to:

1) It’s as wide as the two ton truck I sometimes drive at work, so parking is not fun.

2) The interior noise is sufficient to continue affecting your hearing once you do finally park it

3) This is a brodozer for bros who aren’t into chrome but are into playing soldier. Being neither a bro nor a soldier, pass.

4) Fuel economy. Yeah, I’m that guy. I have one drum that I will bang, and loudly.

Crack Pipe at any price, but especially this price.