When it comes to American cars designed to tear ass, the three biggest camps are arguably Camaro, Mustang, and Corvette. For decades these three factions have been locked in eternal struggle. But there’s hope, in the form of The One Who Is Them All. Behold the Corvamarostang.

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Actually, I’m not sure it’s actually called the Corvamarostang. It could be a Mustorvettaro, or a Camustvette, or something possibly unpronounceable in human tongues.

These pictures have been floating around the internet for a while, but I first saw them yesterday, thanks to a man named Dallas linking to this Facebook post.

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Illustration for article titled All Hail This Mustang-Camaro-Corvette, It Is The Most American Car

The car appears to have started life as a Camaro, and then had the Mustang face grafted on, and then a Corvette ass. I especially like the use of the Corvette crossed-flags badge on the Mustang nose.

Is this wonderful? Terrible? A horrific mockery, or the greatest tribute possible? There’s no way to know. It’s all of that and none of it. It’s everything and nothing, alpha and omega, Corvette and Mustang and Camaro and the uncorruptible, indivisible oneness from three.

It’s the trinity, it’s the three heads of Cerberus, guard dog of the underworld, it’s a statement and also probably someone’s ride to work.

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It’s unknowable, but we must acknowledge and respect it.

All hail the Vettestangaro.

Senior Editor, Jalopnik • Running: 1973 VW Beetle, 2006 Scion xB, 1990 Nissan Pao, 1991 Yugo GV Plus, 2020 Changli EV • Not-so-running: 1973 Reliant Scimitar, 1977 Dodge Tioga RV (also, buy my book!)

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