Photo: BMW

The Jalopnik Editorial Board today was startled by some news. The BMW 640i xDrive Gran Turismo is, apparently, a car that exists. It is so much so a car that exists, in fact, that a whole entire post was written about it in 2017.

“You mean the Gran Coupe?” multiple members of the staff queried when the car was brought up. A correction quickly followed.

“Wait, the 6 Series... GT is a thing???” another demanded. “I thought they stopped at the 5 Series.”

“Fuck this,” two others chimed in.

For us, 2017 exists in a haze of forever ago, when we were younger and less wrinkled. News of the 640i xDrive Gran Turismo drifted dreamily by and sank, out of sight, out of mind, into our collective subconsciousness.

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It was a momentary lapse in memory, sure, but surely also in part due to the very nature of the 640i xDrive Gran Turismo. It is a car that exists at the precise juxtaposition of something and nothing all at once, its looks encompassing the very best of office-park anonymity.

The Jalopnik Editorial Board—the fourth-most respected editorial board in all of automotive writing—would like to take this time to say we will aim higher in the future, and remember the 6 Series Gran Turismo is a thing. You readers deserve nothing less.

Meanwhile, just today, it was reported that BMW is introducing a $13.6 billion savings plan of increasing efficiency while slashing costs.

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We can now offer a professional opinion of which model can get slashed first.