A Man In An Old Ferrari Goes Fast

Illustration for article titled A Man In An Old Ferrari Goes Fast

This is an enlightening and instructional video on how to get pole position for your run group at the Monza historic races. Step 1: Be Sam Hancock. Step 2: Drive this mega 512 BBLM racing car. Step 3: Never be going not fast.

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The Monza historic races are nothing to sneeze at. Unlike many vintage race events here in the U.S. our European counterparts put the emphasis on racing rather than on historic. These are real dog fights from start to finish, and when it comes to setting a pole time, Sam Hancock doesn’t muck about. He hops in the Ferrari 512 BBLM and turns the wick up to full send.

And he’d have gone faster, too, if it weren’t for that damned Porsche. I appreciate that Ferrari man gave Porsche man the look (above) as he passed up the inside. I’ve given that look before. It says far more than words ever could.

It says “You stupid fucking ****. You, Porsche driver, I’m talking to you, shithead. You just cost me 20 miles per hour. Twenty miles per hour, and a good lap time. That’s right. What are you going to do about it? What are you going to do about it, asshole? You’re fucking shit. Where did you learn your trade, you stupid fucking ****, you idiot? Who ever told you that you could race with men? Oh, I’m gonna have your license, shithead.” That’s what that look says.

Anyway, it’s an excellent lap in an excellent car with an excellent driver. Click the play button, crank up your speakers, and send your Tuesday evening out with a sonorous 12-cylinder bang!

Jalopnik contributor with a love for everything sketchy and eclectic.

DISCUSSION

Wait... With all that free flowing profanity, exactly what did you feel the compulsion censor???

By any chance, does it start with a “c”, end with a “t” and have a UN in the middle? Cuz I can’t think of anything else you’d censor after all that... And to be honest, once you’re dropping F-bombs, A-holes and Ish-heads, it’s kind of pointless actually. ...Hang on, are you a Brit? Cuz that would explain it. ...Those bloody tossers.