What do Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, two blow-up sex dolls, a Lincoln Town Car, and a parking garage have in common? A crazy Florida man and some very funny public indecency charges. NSFW content ahead.
Officer Jeffry Karau responded to reports of lewd activity and public disturbance at the Publix parking garage at the Cape Coral Shopping Center. A crowd had gathered around a prominently parked 1998 Lincoln Town Car and the onlookers feverishly pointed the officer in that direction. When he approached the car, the passenger, well, the only human passenger, emerged and presented his drivers license. Officer Karau observed through the window a pair of naked blow-up dolls and the game was afoot.
On site witnesses report the man had parked in the space and proceeded to make out and have relations with his rubbery twins, as well as expose himself by way of customized shorts, which police confiscated in the interest of decency. The man (the myth, the legend) was taken into custody and charged with both disturbing the peace, and trespassing after warning. Charges for lewd conduct (for the whole "custom" shorts thing) are pending. We just want to know what the deal is with all those king size packages of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. Let this be a lesson to you — never look into cars parked in public garages, you might be scarred for life by what you see. [TheSmokingGun]