Ten White Trash Cars To Match Your Mullet

By
We may earn a commission from links on this page.

There are cars that appeal to a certain group of people: the mullet-wearing, Wal-Mart-shopping, the trailer parking. Our readers offered up their suggestions on the ten most white trash vehicles in America.

This is Answers of the Day - where we take the best ten responses from the previous day's "Question Of The Day". It's by you and for you, the Jalopnik readers.

Advertisement

If you want to see this post in one long page click here.

Advertisement

10.) Ford Aerostar

Suggested by: ReverendDexter

Why It's White Trash: The Aerostar was Ford's first minivan and considered by some a "sportvan". There are in fact many lifted Aerostars floating around somewhere; I've seen the pictures, so it did happen. The lifting and the sheer numbers of Aerostars you see in Wal-Mart parking lots, which is somehow more than you will ever see on the road ever, is a testament to the trashiness of the Aerostar and its buyers. I mean, you have to carry around Tiffany, Heather, Cody, Dylan, Dermitt, Jordan, Taylor, Brittney, Wesley, Rumer, Scout, Cassidy, Zoe, Chloe, Max, Hunter, Kendal, Kaitlin, Noah, Sasha, Morgan, Keira, Ian, Lauren, Kubert, and Phil.

Advertisement

Photo Credit: jcarwil

9.) Dodge Neon

Suggested by: uzter54

Why It's White Trash: I do not wish the Dodge Neon on anyone, yet hoards of people will it upon themselves. The SRT-4 model doesn't seem that bad, but the first generation model is atrocious. The only redeeming feature this car has is its initial purchase price. The Neon's cheapness and American roots makes it attractive to white trash Americans. Many of the first generation cars are still puttering around with holes in the exhaust and different color body panels.

Advertisement

Photo Credit: CarGurus.com

8.) Chevy S-10

Suggested by: Ford Tempo Fanatic

Why It's White Trash: Everyone needs a truck at some point or another. The problem is that those who can't afford the Silverado opt for the S-10, and those that opt for a Chevy product over a Ford product, like the Ranger, tend to be of the trailer park sort. What follows a white trash purchasing an S-10 is almost overwhelming.

Advertisement

Photo Credit: About.com

7.) Chevy Beretta

Suggested by: red91sit

Why It's White Trash: Indy is a lot classier than NASCAR, having more races where left turns are followed by right turns, but Indy draws the same type of beer swilling, mullet wearing crowds. A yellow Beretta convertible was used as the pace car for the 1990 Indianapolis 500. The race Sunday, sell Monday mantra really does apply, even though it didn't race, but it was some damn good marketing on GM's part. It caught the eye of the crowd and many trailer parks were lined with Berettas.

Advertisement

Photo Credit: Christopher Beikmann

6.) Fox Body Ford Mustang

Suggested by: koolykool44

Why It's White Trash: Imagine yourself in the driver's seat of a Fox Body Mustang convertible. You're cruising at a steady 65. Place your hand on the back of your head. There's a 95% percent chance you're fingers are running through a luxurious mullet. Now, the rest of you Fox Body aficionados need to calm down, if you don't have a mullet you're in the other 5%. The convertible Mustang's big engine and hoontastic capabilities are lustworthy characteristics for when you want to impress Brandine and sitting at the Sonic is done best with the top down.

Advertisement

Photo Credit: horsepowerjunkies.com

5.) Pontiac Trans Am

Suggested by: Spiegel

Why It's White Trash: Burt Reynolds is to blame for this one, also bootlegging. Something about evading the law and transporting illegal booze is appealing to trailer trash. There's nothing like pulling up to your trailer in your 1978 Trans Am, T-tops down, and Skynyrd blasting out the solitary working speaker.

Advertisement

Photo Credit: vistavision

4.) Pontiac Grand Am

Suggested by: n0m4d

Why It's White Trash: You might be white trash when you chop the roof off your Grand Am in order to transport a bull only 23 miles. Have a look in the back seat, he left a present for you. The Grand Am is not a particularly good car or even attractive, but it seems to be the vehicle of choice for many trailer park residents. A trip to the neighboring Wal-Mart will confirm our suspicions. I must have counted over 20 Grand Ams on the walk from the rear of the parking lot to the front door of the store.

Advertisement

3.) Chevy El Camino

Suggested by: WolfpackChevy07

Why It's White Trash: The El Camino serves two purposes really, hauling around anything in comfort and style or making a pool out of the bed. Don't get me wrong, the El Camino and all its future Ute permutations are awesome. Jalopnik loves them. But for every person who buys one because it's awesome, there are three people who buy one because it matches their haircut: business up front, party in the rear.

Advertisement

Photo Credit: Ammon Beckstrom

2.) Modified Chevy Cavalier

Suggested by: twinrotormotor

Why It's White Trash: Evading the law and bootlegging seems to be a recurring theme with white trash, as seen by this Cavalier in General Lee digs. The Cavalier is a decently affordable car, so its appeal to anyone is blatantly obvious, but it takes a very special type of person to put money and half-assed effort to modify the Cavalier. It is not uncommon to see Cavaliers with custom paint jobs, scissor doors, and ri-donk-ulous wheels cruising up to the local Wal-Mart. However, all the Cavalier mods are strictly "aesthetic" and there is no real performance.

Advertisement

Photo Credit: Laser Burners

1.) Chevy Monte Carlo

Suggested by: RB26Skyline

Why It's White Trash: NASCAR holds a special place in the hearts of white trash and because of this, so does the Chevy Monte Carlo. For best results, however, the car needs to be done up à la NASCAR, complete with Budweiser decals. You have to look like and be like your favorite NASCAR driver, which could have been anyone because there were so many Monte Carlo's on track, to be king of the trailer park.