Jalopnik
40 inch rims on a Regal called Donkey Kong — you see what they did there? We're practically speechless, this is certainly a sign of the end times so we feel there should be commentary here, but on what? Where do you even start? Our cup of questions overflows. Maybe start with where does one get wheels like that? And how do you even install tires that big? Can they be balanced? Is the car equipped with an air suspension and if so, does the car get even taller, or does it settle down for easy entry? What does a roll center look like on a car that tall? Does Ackerman steering still apply? Have they accounted for all of the first and second order harmonics in the damping? These are all things we need to know!
40 inch rims on a Regal called Donkey Kong — you see what they did there? We're practically speechless, this is certainly a sign of the end times so we feel there should be commentary here, but on what? Where do you even start? Our cup of questions overflows. Maybe start with where does one get wheels like that? And how do you even install tires that big? Can they be balanced? Is the car equipped with an air suspension and if so, does the car get even taller, or does it settle down for easy entry? What does a roll center look like on a car that tall? Does Ackerman steering still apply? Have they accounted for all of the first and second order harmonics in the damping? These are all things we need to know!Above the sheer mechanics of the thing, why bestow a creation this astounding with a name so lost in a sea of online Nintendo fanboyism? If you roll on true double dubs would you not want the world to know? We understand the joke, but seriously, why not "Donkosaurus Rex" or "MegaDonk-o-tron" or "40": A Donk Odyssey"? Nonetheless, we are duly impressed by this mastery of all things Donk. It's supposedly the work of 1USAMotorsports but we couldn't find reference. If you know more about this Hotlanta based ride do let us know, we are intrigued.
sources: SpeedSportLife, Youtube
Comments
fantasy garage it!!
Er, Cutlass? It's clearly a GNX, I mean Regal..
er. they're different?
that's a Regal, not a Cutlass. The Cutlass had vertical tail lights and a bit of a curve on the grill to meet up with the top of the front bumper.
and whats the performance like? does anyone think it has a 0 to 60?
Wow. And people thought the rice machines were ugly.
22" rims = Stupid
40" rims = so stupid it's awesome. This is proof than when you push something way past the extreme, it goes from bad to great.
Spent all money on car-none left for real video camera.
@bmwfanatic: @bd_juju: My mistake, those GM's are so distinctive I can't believe I made that mistake.
My question: Why do so many companies named "Racing" and "Motorsports" install stuff that measurably slows cars down?
at least they could have pritted up the underbelly of the beast.
BLEECH!
Are those really tires or just a bit of rubber wrapped around an old oil drum?
...and she moves under her own power? or do they sorta push it a little and start filming when they're out of the frame?
Uh...
The ride on that thing must be worse than a Conestoga wagon. But at least the handling is bound to be sharp, what with the low center of gravity and all.
In the words of Michael Scott:
Win-win-win!
So, pneumatic tyres were just a passing fad?
@thatguy01:
I too was going to comment on what the hell this company could have to do with anything considered a "motorsport". This has a "motor", but unless absurdity is officially a "sport", they lack that portion of their name.
Solid tires = mine equipment.
I want to see it crush some barrels. Then maybe the name would be okay.
*grabs can of jet fuel, a zippo, and a ticket to Atlanta* "Back in a second"
@rlj676: On the other hand, if absurdity is a sport, we have an olympic contender right here.
NOO! Don't let them molest that MR2 Spyder next to it. Please God!
part of me really hates this trend.
part of me wants to put 100" rims on a semi and name it Donkimus Prime.
I never see these monstrosities up here in the "clean" north.
Points and laughs:
Bahahaha.
ree tah ded... durt!!!
This is the answer to: car I would most want to roll. Just to destroy it. Shouldn't be too hard, any speed over about 5mph should do it.
I would like to find a nice 1980's Regal and fix it up nice with a chevy small block. My first car was a 81 Regal, the whole nostalgia thing is hitting. But it is CRAP like this that makes them hard to find in unmolested condition. Same goes for early/mid 70's full size GM convertibles.
May they drive over potholes until the wheels don't even resemble round.
@Ben Wojdyla: Those are all questions I'm certain that no one involved with this car has ever comtemplated.
The brainstorming for this car went something like this,
"First DONK rollin on 40s, yo!"
It's Obama's answer to Little Al's carbon footprint fisaco.
And the line between hood and country blurs ever more.
Huh. I didn't know John Deere made low profile all-weather tires...
Could a vehicle look anymore precarious?
Please Stop, People!
If you think that crap looks good
or if you spend your money on this horse shit...
Welp... You deserve whatever life gives you.
What can't a endless supply of drug money do! I hope that guy tries to ghost ride the whip and gets ran the fuck over.
That song...it's mesmerizing
I have one answer. Those are retreads for big rig tires, so no air.
Cars like this are like cut flowers. They are designed to look like they do for only a few days before they begin their decay. That's why you won't run into too many of them limping down the highway on mis-matched rims in three different shades of primer.
This is not just a donk-oriented phenomenon. Check any World of Wheels show for confirmation.
@Peabody S. Preston, Esq., Bruce, El Caminion: Normal Gasoline will work better. Despite it's reputation Jet fuel isn't nearly as flammable, it has to be in a mist in order to light properly.
Don't ask me how I know these things.
What I want to know is where are the brakes? Have they done anything to strengthen the axles... is this "thing" going to be our next installment of Donked on the Strip [jalopnik.com]
Baby Jesus isn't just crying; he's slitting his wrists and dousing the room in gasoline.
He insulted my Monza. Where's Ralph Nader when you need him?
Once again, the white man co-opts a black cultural trend, completely overdoes it, and ruins it for everyone.
Kudos, honkies. Kudos.
*Wait, these dudes are white, right? Yeah, they are.
@Impalamino:
It was pretty ruined and overdone to begin with.
@Smells_Homeless: i kind of want to see one that still has the super-tall suspension, but rolling on 15" steelies with mismatched hubcaps...
Hell, I'll take one!!! My only question is... Do you think it can tow my Corn Harvester?
See you all are missing the point here. Those are giant fan blades to chop down the appending waves of mutant zombie apocalypse...
I think this same car was featured on this site a couple of years ago, complete with painted-on tread lines on the rims.
* Yes, its ridculous. Having said that, I do love the simplicity of the 3 node AMG style. Of course 40" is way over the top, but on another ride, with a decent size & chrome of course, this style wheel keeps the brakes cool + is EASY to clean.
We have BBS style wheels on our Jag cabrio & mercy I hate trying to clean those bstrds!
@smokyburnout: I see that a lot around here...jacked up crown vics that are rollin on the stock wheels. makes me laugh. and then I feel sad for laughing. and then I laugh at myself for feeling sad. it's an endless cycle.
I want to see them getting in and out of it.
@P161911: I had the same shiver of horror you did. My first ride was a 1984 Cutlass. I've looked around for one but they've either been violated like this or the price is sky high...
@smokyburnout: Oh man, we see these all the time here in salted-roadsville. A lifted donk without its dubs is just about the saddest thing you'll ever see. It makes me all get emo when it's a Roadmaster or an Impala SS, except I don't want to cut myself.
I see it backing up a bit, but I really didn't see any footage of it going forward...maybe they should change the soundtrack
And they've even got their own theme song. So classy.
I want so badly to see that thing at the dragstrip.
@thunder: "Somebody catch it!"