Top Secret Slogan Will Help Jalopnik Sell More Cars

This is getting ridiculous. Folks, please, we don't sell cars. We don't sell parts, we don't repair cars, we are not a dealership, we are not an importer/exporter. No doubt this clear and to the point statement will be overlooked by people like Paul WRIGHT, who writes to us with a proposal. He tells us he has a Grand Cherokee and he wants to buy a new one. But he also wants to help us increase sales. How you might ask? Why, with his "very powerful slogan," of course. Evidently, this top-secret verbiage helped multiply sales at the local Jeep dealer he sold it to by four times (so he claims). Let's hope he handles sales sloganeering better than he handles basic English.

Dear Sirs Please allow me to approach on you in the following matter. I am the giant fan of Jeeps. I have currently 2003 Jeep Grand Cherokee, Ltd. but I am decided to buy the fully loaded Jeeps Grand Cherokee 6.1 soon. I would like ask you, if you would be interested to use my idea to get sales of your cars increased several times. I can offer you my very powerful slogan. This slogan will do that job for you. I have sold my slogan to the dealer of Jeeps here and they got sales of Jeeps increased four times. You could to use that slogan to get sales of your cars increased in your area several times and to get great marketing advantage over your competitors. Please let me know, if you will be interested in my offer. I will be very pleased to hear from you. Have a great day, Yours sincerely Paul WRIGHT, Engr.