We’re about to enter the Zone of Several Holidays, a magical time near the anus of the year, and, as per tradition, we must ask the dapper Colonel Yearend for directions. In our 1932 Opel. Thank you, Colonel, and a satisfying Year Termination to you, too!

Senior Editor, Jalopnik • Running: 1973 VW Beetle, 2006 Scion xB, 1990 Nissan Pao, 1991 Yugo GV Plus, 2020 Changli EV • Not-so-running: 1977 Dodge Tioga RV (also, buy my book!: https://rb.gy/udnqhh)

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“Welcome to Concours D’Elegance. You see the kid in the yellow shirt on his phone by the 3rd traffic cone? He’ll point to to section B next to the vintage Scion/Saturns. Here’s your lanyard and don’t forget to control your woman’s eyes and spit on the plebs. Macaroons and complementary mustache combs are next to the Meguiare’s Wax and Polish booth”