Spiegel Hernandez Law Firm.
4533 East Chamomile Lane,
South Bronx, NY.
To Mr. luisthebeast,
It has come to my firm's attention that your first name is "Luis". Since my first name is also Luis and because I am older than you, it is with some regret that I must inform you that I (as of this moment I shall refer to myself as Luis-1 and you as Luis-2, to avoid confusion) Luis-1 am issuing a formal complaint requesting your name to be changed to something other than Luis.
Should you not comply with my demands I will have no other recourse than to sue you for copyright infringement, identity theft, defamation of character, slander, libel and damages suffered throughout your lifetime.
As I have to pay royalties to Louis Amrstrong on a technicality so should you pay royalties to me.
I expect your prompt name change with notarized proof as soon as possible.
Thank you for your cooperation in this matter.
Spiegel "Luis-1" Hernandez.