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Our man-without-fear, known only as "Joel" (if that is your real name, "Joel"), delved deep into the Googles to discover what we could not the brand, model and year of "vintage car" that Loose Lips Knispel hoped to trade a rare baby Greenwing parrot for after she secreted it away from her place of employment in her titsling. And no, despite our best guesses, it wasn't a Mitsubishi Starion or a Plymouth Fire Arrow the classic vehicle in question was a '64 Karmann Ghia. Which, when we sit down and actually ponder it, seems like an oddly appropriate car for a thirtysomething woman in Florida to accept in trade for a hot parrot.

Woman accused of unorthodox theft of rare parrot [The News-Press]

Woman Attempts to Trade Pilfered Parrot for Vintage Car [Internal]