Turn off the lights. Crank up your computerā€™s volume. Sit down. Hit play. Hear drug lord Tuco Salamanca read the full warranty for the Nissan NV200 little cargo van.

Lose yourself in all the rolled ā€˜rā€™s. Empty your mind. Think about rust protection. Play it again.


Let the madness take you.

Contact the author at jason@jalopnik.com.