Illustration for article titled Lady Traffic Barrel Monster, You Are Kind Of Creeping Us Out

Wow, you look different. So, uh, how's things? You're not dating anyone? The facelift looks great! You had barrel-reduction surgery? Wow, it — um, yeah. No, you look great! Hey, how'd you find my apartment again?

Advertisement

Lady Traffic Barrel Monster here was spotted on I-35 just south of Kansas City. She's apparently ditched her creepy '80s punker hairdo for a wig that looks like it was made from grass or hemp or something. She claims to want to get together for drinks. We might have given her a fake number, and not just because we're scared of her saw-toothed ex-boyfriend.

Advertisement
Illustration for article titled Lady Traffic Barrel Monster, You Are Kind Of Creeping Us Out

A date? That sounds... great! No, May doesn't work for me. What are you doing in a decade or so? Nothing? I'll give you a call!



Hat tip to Milkbone98!
[MegainPhoto/SmugMug]

Share This Story

Get our newsletter