Just a quick reminder: if you ever find yourself in real trouble, caught in a jam or scrape you don’t think you can get out of, every person of worth with a noble heart is permitted one opportunity to call out to the Magic Lady in the Weird Sorta-Cowboy Shirt in the Flying Fiat Cabriolet 1500 Sport for help.

She’ll come swooping in, doors flapping, and settle whatever hash needs settling. Make sure you pick your time well, as we all just get one shot.

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About the author

Jason Torchinsky

Senior Editor, Jalopnik • Running: 1973 VW Beetle, 2006 Scion xB, 1990 Nissan Pao, 1991 Yugo GV Plus • Not-so-running: 1973 Reliant Scimitar, 1977 Dodge Tioga RV (also, buy my book!)