Here's an old painting I did of a Type I VW engine over Egyptian hieroglyphics. See if you can find the fake glyphs!


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Amateurs! The Wolf, as in Wolfsburg, appears in Col. 1. Perhaps unintentionally... For my money, that ain't no dog — it's the Wolfsburg Wappentier (mascot). Others have correctly found the lamp ISO (in its domelight orientation), Camping Couple w/ Guitars (col. 1 & 8), screwball. Here's the better part about the screwball: It's close to the torch, as in Jason Torchinsky AKA Torch from the painter's signature and we clearly read "Jason Torchinsky is a screwball!" Maybe that Wolfsburg wolf is actually in col. 6. He's appeared in several guises in VW and Wolfsburg history. VW logo, skidding car, also found previously. Chevy Impala logo, col. 3. Business shoe footprint, far right. Staff Man (shop owner, clearly the staff is the ceremonial power bestowed him by VW Parts and Service) is telling Headdress Man he needs a new fuel pump to avoid trademark Jalopnik Fiery Death. Just kidding — a new fuel pump NEVER avoided FD in these things, it was the fuel LINES, silly man... High voltage ignition pictogram, col. 8, includes distributor and coil. Other than that, it seems to say that Jason took his girlfriend camping, had sex by the campfire, and needed a new fuel pump to get home (happens to me all the time...) Absolutely everything else in the painting is a pictogram of official VW Service tools. spinny jack, sway bar holder, many hook thingies, and birds waiting to eat you if you don't get that damn fuel pump working.