Fast cars, smooth criminals, and exotic locales: Porsche has all of them at hand, and it just needs one thing to turn its current legal dramas into a multi-million dollar international summer smash.

I learned today that Porsche executives are wanted men in India for possibly screwing a bunch of Indian car dealers out of exclusive importation rights to the country.

Having watched many hours of Bollywood, I know that this is just a romantic interest, three karate fight scenes, and ten musical numbers away from turning Porsche CEO Mattias Müller into the devil-may-care star of a bad boy hit movie, but Spiegel Kerrigan, Queen of Blades has a way to make this something bigger than that.

Picture this. Mumbai, 3 a.m. Müller and his execs aka Müller's Eight just entered the Indian border through the docks. They're all holding suitcases, looking badass. Suddenly Indian special forces bust through and start shooting everyone. "TO ZE CARS" yells Müller and they all open up their suitcases and unravel Uzis. They make their way to the containers and open them up. Indian special forces are wondering where they went, radio chatter is going insane and then they all hear the sound of engines revving up. Everyone converges on the containers just as nine Porsche 911 turbos in different colors fly out of the docks and into Mumbai streets.

Indian Special Forces all jump into their Tata Nanos (ISF's official vehicles) and chase them. But just before ISF gets out of the docks, the entrance is blown up. On the other side of the street, on top of a building stands Danny Trejo with a detonator. "Now we're even." says Trejo over Müller's comm and disappears.

I say Michael Bay directs.

I don't know about you, but I'd watch it.

Photo Credit: Brendan Lim, Tata