They say there's no good English parallel for Schadenfreude (of the paranoid kind or otherwise). Well, perhaps epicaricacy — but we digress. There's most certainly no good word for taking joy in the relative unfortunateness of another person's ride while enjoying the pleasures of driving. That's where the brilliance of Jalopnik commenters comes in. They're able to make up their own words. And not only in English, but in the language of precision itself. It's a useful tool when you're reading about reveals of Brucegasmic SUV's and Detroit-designed German vans.

One commenter, TheCartorialist, pointed out that many people are going to be spending a lot of money on a road-going SUV that's going to spend most of its time in traffic. Thankfully, Lascaux Caveman was around to point out the joy coming from all of that there pain:

"Man and machine acting as one in harmony with the road as we sneer down our noses at the poor saps doing their commutes in crapbox Hyundais and Sentras."

Also known in the German as "Fahrvergshadenfreudenungen."

That's right, say the word.