The Most Exclusive Holiday Gift In NYC Is This $300 MTA Trash Can

Illustration for article titled The Most Exclusive Holiday Gift In NYC Is This $300 MTA Trash Can
Screenshot: MTA

It is important for me to notify you that you can buy one of the MTA subway trash cans you see at any NYC subway station for $300.

It is unclear to me why the MTA is willing to part ways with a trash can for $300. Where does it get this price? What happened to this subway can for it to be offered for sale? What kind of cleaning was done to the trash can prior to sale? Was it $300 worth of cleaning?

“Authentic, unique, and probably one of the most useful items in every home, work or office now can be yours. Hurry and grab this rare item which is available in limited quantity,” the description reads. Clicking through for more information gets you the following:

A Processing fee of $75* plus the cost of insurance, shipping & handling will apply to each order

If applicable, sales tax will [sic]

This item is available for pick up ONLY!

For Details, Please email

Asset.Recovery@nyct.com.

Where is the trash can? How do you get the trash can? Why would anyone buy the trash can? What do you tell someone when they walk into your apartment and say either:

“Why do you have a subway trash can?”

or

“Why did you steal a subway trash can?”

Do you tell them that, yes, you stole it, even though you clicked on the “Memorabilia & Collectibles” tag of the MTA website, the same one that tells you when your train line’s schedule has been altered due to construction, and when you saw the gleaming visage of these hulking, clanging trash cans that look like they could be used interchangeably with a wrecking ball or boat anchor, you said to yourself “I have to have it?” Or do you just say “Yeah I borrowed my buddy’s truck and we stole it” with a completely straight face?

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If you buy this MTA trash can, please email us at tips at jalopnik dot com and let us know why.

Raphael Orlove is features editor for Jalopnik.

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DISCUSSION

Many years ago, my son decided he wanted a stop light for Christmas. So, I went down to the Baltimore Public works warehouse and got one for about $20. The next year, he tried to stump me again asking for a fire hydrant. Again, a trip to the Baltimore Public Works warehouse got me one, and they even cut off the 8' long pipe which they are mounted on.

He stopped trying to stump me after that, but he still has both of those things some 30 years later, much to his wife’s distress. They have moved with them to California and then back to Rhode Island. (BTW, those damn fire hydrants are heavy as hell!!)