The pandemic is a disaster, the election is a shit-show, and before you know it, the weather is going to bring more doom and gloom to our lives. But that’s not happening this weekend, so fire up your cars one last time before salt threatens to destroy them, and let’s pointlessly burn a shit-ton of gasoline on Woodward Avenue.
Of course, if you’re driving a diesel or electric car, you’re welcome, too. The purpose of the event is simply to rekindle our love for cars during a time when automobiles may not really seem to matter. We’ll meet at the Walmart parking lot on Maple Ave. in Troy at 4 p.m. Look for a dilapidated 1985 Jeep J10 pickup with a cap over its eight-foot bed.
Remember, there’s a global pandemic happening right now, and over 100,000 cases are being reported daily, so if you see a cool car that you like, I’d refrain from planting a big wet one on the owner to signal your admiration. Maybe just, from more than six feet away and with a mask on, tell them you like their vehicle. That should do the trick.
At 4:15 or 4:20, we’ll file out onto Maple westbound until we hit Woodward Avenue, where we’ll drive south, turn around, drive north, turn around, drive south, turn around—you get the idea. It’s entirely pointless and silly, but that’s how cruising Woodward works. You throw your left arm out the window, grab the steering wheel at the top with your hand, burn gas for no reason, and wonder why the hell you’re having so much fun.
- Woodward Car Cruise
- 4 p.m.
- Walmart Parking Lot in Troy
- Look for a junky but remarkably rust-free Jeep J10 pickup
- Stay >six feet from others. Ideally, stay in your car.
- Wear Masks
- At around 4:20 p.m., we’ll roll out to Woodward and cruise. We’ll probably lose each other and disperse from there.