Wildly Improbable Nissan-on-Nissan-on-Nissan Wreck Reveals Universe to Be a Simulation

There’s all kinds of theories floating around now that reality, the place where you sleep and pee and buy lunch, may in fact be a simulation of some sort, run on some vast, unknowable computer. Even Elon Musk thinks we’re likely living in a simulation. I normally am pretty dismissive of this idea, at least until I saw this Facebook post about a teal Nissan Hardbody truck that hit a maroon Nissan Sentra that hit a teal Nissan Hardbody that hit a maroon Nissan Sentra. Uh, that does sound a lot like a glitch in the reality-sim.

Now, to be fair, we’re not 100 percent certain of the whole Hardbody/Sentra/Hardbody/Sentra pattern; the pictures clearly show a teal Nissan Hardbody hitting a maroon Nissan Sentra which then hits another teal Nissan Hardbody, but pictures of the final maroon Sentra don’t seem to be in the post, even though the original poster, and others who have posted these images, claim the car was there.


We did some digging, and according to a post from the Smyrna, Tennessee Fire Department, it looks like this wreck was just a teal Hardbody bread/maroon Sentra meat sandwich:

Let’s be clear, though, even just this grouping of two teal Hardbodies sandwiching one Sentra is pretty damn improbable. How many of these Nissan Hardbodies are still on the road? And two teal ones? Sandwiching another Nissan of roughly the same era?

This could still easily be a world-simulation glitch. Easy.

As far as what the front teal Hardbody hit, it’s not clear from any of the photos, but I think there’s a clue here:


Could that floral-shaped dent in the hood have been caused by an impact against a rear-mounted spare tire?


All we do know is that somehow, chance has served us up a teal Nissan Hardbody and maroon Nissan Sentra wreckwich, and the odds of that happening again are infinitesimal.


Sure, it would be cool if there was that one extra maroon Sentra at the front to make a true repeating pattern, but, well, I guess the simulation still has some error-checking in place.

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Jason Torchinsky

Senior Editor, Jalopnik • Running: 1973 VW Beetle, 2006 Scion xB, 1990 Nissan Pao, 1991 Yugo GV Plus • Not-so-running: 1973 Reliant Scimitar, 1977 Dodge Tioga RV (also, buy my book!)