Photos: Newspress

These days, do you really stand out if you drive a $3 million Bugatti Chiron? And God help you if you’re still driving around in the last-generation Veyron, which may as well be a broke-ass 1990s Honda Accord to the hyper-wealthy. No, what you need is this: the Bugatti La Voiture Noire, price tag $12.5 million.

Of course, Bugatti is only making one of them—this one. So if you obtain one, you’ll be able to properly lord it over the other 7.4 billion of us on this planet.

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“La Voiture Noire” means “the black car,” and besides being the total extent of my French it’s a very apt description here. The name also comes as an homage to the Type 57 SC Atlantic, said to be one of Jean Bugatti’s finest creations.

It has a hand-built carbon fiber body and the same bonkers quad-turbo 8.0-liter W16 engine as the Chiron and Divo, rated at about 1,500 horsepower. Called “a feast of aesthetics” by Bugatti, it boasts a deep glossy black exterior that’s said to be full of continuous lines with no interruptions.

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But more than anything else, the most notable thing is the price tag—at 11 million Euros (before tax, it must be noted) Bugatti openly calls this “the most expensive new car of all time.”

Fuel economy is rated at 22.5 mpg combined on the European cycle, if you were at all curious.

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One thing Bugatti did not give us a glimpse of at all is the cabin, which may be so purely luxurious and opulent that it cannot be seen with eyes belonging to anyone with fewer than 12 homes. I believe that if you or I, some Poors, gazed inside La Voiture Noire our bodies would turn into jewel-encrusted statues with our mortal souls trapped inside, forever.

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I bet it has some real nice leather, is what I’m saying.

As I mentioned Bugatti is only making one of these and it’s already been sold to an unnamed “Bugatti enthusiast.” Maybe we’ll see it for sale at a Florida buy-here-pay-here used lot when the repairs get too expensive. Who can say.

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