Looks like Pig & Bear were able to finally get theirs — NHTSA took a brand new Dodge Caliber and smashed the crap out of it just to rate how well it withstood the impact. Lo and behold, it received 5 stars for taking it in the face like the little slut of a CUV it is — proving even if he had taken Pig & Bear to the meadow, he'd have taken them there safely in the front seats and in a frontal collision at 35 mph. Yup, this li'l whore is anything but cute — and Pig & Bear can finally rest in peace.

2007 Dodge Caliber 4-DR. w/SAB [safercar.gov]

Ad Watch: Dodge's Higher Caliber Of Viral Video — Shoots Bear In Face, Eats Pig [internal]