2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One - Jalopnik Comments

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

IGotShotgun — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 12:44:10 EDT

H3 Alpha climbs some crazy hills in Moab, the same place the review picture was taken! Enjoy!

IGotShotgun

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

karnak — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 04:11:12 EDT

I thought my new 1114 was heavy, and ugly. This thing takes the cake though.

[images.kodakgallery.com]

I would like to see them put some of the ergonomic work that they put into this truck, into the new 1151. I could really use that seat, I hate sitting on top of the battery box.

karnak

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

TechnoDestructo — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 04:02:29 EDT

Mid-sized...the smallest trucks of every manufacturer in the US are all mid-sized now. Whatever happened to compact pickups?

A couple more years of rising fuel prices, and Kia, Toyota, Honda, Suzuki, and MAYBE Mazda and Hyundai can deliver the coup de grace to the US auto-industry, I guess, as they'll be the only ones ready to deliver them. I suppose GM might have something via Daewoo...

TechnoDestructo

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

skulldriveshaft — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 03:07:57 EDT

for fuck sakes!

skulldriveshaft

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Shapeshifter — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 19:11:31 EDT

So, uh... Hummer actually made something that works properly off-road? What?

@BMWCARL:

I would!

Shapeshifter

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

drewheyman — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 19:09:39 EDT

Abilities aside, that thing is Ridgeline ugly, with enough old-school Avalanche (also very ugly) plasticyness to impress a stadium-sized Tupperwear party.

drewheyman

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Triborough — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 17:54:31 EDT

Why?

Triborough

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

mytdawg — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 17:03:10 EDT

@weatherman: They need to make the 4 wheeled equivalent of these. Although I think Jeep just about has it covered.

mytdawg

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

jolaszek — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 16:33:05 EDT

Gawldamn, that thing's got more rear overhang than Liza Minelli.

jolaszek

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Feds — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 15:44:32 EDT

So, we have estabilshed, fully 2 days before the Jalop Final Summation, that this is a completely pointless vehicle for anyone who has more sense than money. Well done team!

If only Chrycerberus were smart enough to unleash the Unlimited Pickup avec diesel upon us...

Feds

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

weatherman — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 15:36:21 EDT

@mechimike: I believe the expression is "all hat, no cattle" though "all hat, no horse" seems to be a legitimate alternative in some circles.

I think that Hummer really managed to get a pretty bad rep that they're having a hard time shaking. Serious 4wheelers consider them pretentious while others consider them wasteful gas-guzzlers. This new "purpose built" campaign may help, but I think if they want to really change their image they have to do something a little more radical - like only allowing cars in flat-black or sand colors, no chrome, steel wheels (lock-bolted on so nobody can put dubs on 'em) with nobbies, no AC and no leather interior. That'd make sure that the only people who drive them were pretty serious about offroading.

weatherman

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

MeDuh — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 15:23:50 EDT

well as long as it isn't a buggy nightly build.

MeDuh

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

MeDuh — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 15:23:00 EDT

/Me trying-too-hard Duh

MeDuh

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

MeDuh — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 15:22:23 EDT

I'll wait for the gold master.

MeDuh

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

mayim — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 15:19:29 EDT

Are those stock tires? Either way, does anyone have sizing information? I would like these on a H3 Alpha (no T).

Thanks.

mayim

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

mytdawg — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 15:09:03 EDT

You guys are missing the point and the point is that this is going to be cool when rich dummies are done with them and resale has tanked and I can pick one up cheap.

I will get a H3. I just got a 95 Geo so some quick math should bring us up to about 2030 and I'll be able to swing it.

mytdawg

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Dr.Danger, Hasta la victoria siempre! — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 14:37:06 EDT

@Feds: Nice, I was too lazy to look around. I knew you could build this for cheaper.

I would rather pick and choose my own aftermarket parts.

Dr.Danger, Hasta la victoria siempre!

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Mad_Science — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 14:32:58 EDT

@Feds: You can only get a rear locking diff, and it's not a selectable locker, it's the crappy GM "auto" locker that's total crap offroad. Also, no 4:1 transfer case, which is a real killer app.

But, I will give you that if you need a truck, there are better trucks than the H3T, and if you need an offroader that you could drive regularly, there are better options there, too.

...which pretty much confirms that there's not much of a reason to buy an H3T...at least not a good one.

Mad_Science

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Deartháir — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 14:09:26 EDT

@Feds: Well yes... but remember this is their "tough luxury" brand, right? So in the same sense, you can get everything you get in a 'Slade in a Tahoe or Yukon, and only have to pay, what, $90k instead of $160k? Stupid... overpriced... why in my day... uphill both ways... snow in july... liked it that way... dagnabbit.

Sorry... I seem to have had a little stroke there.

Hummers are meant to be overpriced. (Sigh. There is no way to reword that line so that it doesn't sound dirty.) Chevy wants us to think of them as a luxury brand that we pay a premium for the honour of owning.

Deartháir

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Feds — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 14:01:41 EDT

@Dr.Danger:

Just quick clicking on the Chevy Canada website, you can get all of the H3T stuff in a Sierra Crew Cab(5.3l, locking diffs, big tires, Z71, etc, etc....)

and you wind up with a 7500 lb tow capacity, and probably a coule thow for payload as well, and I'll guess that it'll be cheaper.

Point is, for less money, you get more capability out of a Sierra, and some ability not to be immediately called out as a tool for driving it.

Feds

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Maymar the technophobe — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 13:58:03 EDT

@Mad_Science: So what you're saying is you want a Colorado with the extra offroad toys, right?

I admit though, my inner five-year old, feeling deprived of playing with Tonkas, wants one of these a little. Not enough to sign the cheque, just enough to want to play with someone elses.

Maymar the technophobe

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Lackey — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 13:51:55 EDT

I wanna be a designer for Hummer. Must be the easiest job in the world: Walk to copier. Take H1 design sheets and shrink to size. Turn in. Walk back to cubicle. Surf internet.

Lackey

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

BMRFILE — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 13:33:32 EDT

Hummermino!!

Just when you think a Hummer couldn't get uglier. Those GM boys are always thinking.

BMRFILE

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Euromobile — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 13:19:18 EDT

That's got to be about the most sensible, useful Hummer yet. Unfortunately few of its prospective buyers will be sensible and actually put it to good use.

Also, it needs more diesel.

Euromobile

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

graverobber- It says Loud Pipes Save Lives — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 13:07:00 EDT

Leather seats on an off-road vehicle?
So I can slide all over the place while trying to navigate the challenges of the "Hells Revenge" trail?
WTF?

Give me corduroy or give me death.

graverobber- It says Loud Pipes Save Lives

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Dr.Danger, Hasta la victoria siempre! — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 13:02:22 EDT

@Mad_Science: Yeah I am off my game today, I overlooked the Bigger engine and off-road goodies.

It still gives me a Meh.

Dr.Danger, Hasta la victoria siempre!

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Benson2175 — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 13:01:00 EDT

Ugliest mall assault vehicle ever.

Benson2175

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

crazygutgut — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 13:00:22 EDT

All your gas are belong to me

crazygutgut

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

mechimike — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:46:51 EDT

All hat, no cowboy. Seriously. Plastic on a truck? What's next, leather interiors? Sunroofs? _AIR CONDITIONING_???

Maybe me and my '92 Dodge Cummins 4x4 Club Cab are about 30 years behind the times...but I'd still take it over this stupid thing. I'll wager the 3/4 ton Dodge gets better mpg, too.

mechimike

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

smalleyxb122 — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:45:12 EDT

[whiny voice] I wanna go play! [/whiny voice]

smalleyxb122

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

badco/LoJ — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:44:42 EDT

Can I has prerunner?

badco/LoJ

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Ray Wert — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:42:31 EDT

@ash78: Hummer already offers it. New for 2009.

Ray Wert

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Mad_Science — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:40:08 EDT

@Dr.Danger: Bigger engine, 4:1 transfer case, locking diffs front and rear. It's mostly GMT355, but those little additions make all the difference in the world.

The H3 would be a great offroader if it were like 8k cheaper and you could actually see where you were going. Oh, and if gas weren't $3.75/gal.

I think I'd still rather have an FJ Cruiser or Wrangler Unlimited.

Mad_Science

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

cyanics — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:35:28 EDT

too bad lions back is closed. otherwise you could have really felt just how heavy of a truck it is, when it comes crunching down after burning out the brakes and transmission trying to descend.

/done lions back 2x and survived.
//not to be attempted in anything close to this vehicles weight.

cyanics

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

CJJack — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:35:14 EDT

@PeteJayhawk: They're going to, for 2009. It's a 5.3L Vortec, with 300hp/320lb-ft (same as the H3).

CJJack

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

elwood — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:33:53 EDT

God damn this is the ugliest thing I've seen in a long time. And if I was going to go 4-wheeling, I'd build myself a truck for half the price that'd be twice as capable.

elwood

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Dr.Danger, Hasta la victoria siempre! — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:33:13 EDT

@Feds: I think a better comparison would be the Chevrolet Colorado/GMC Canyon/i-Series/Holden etc...

If it is close to the same platform, GMT355, then it is the same crap regurgitated and marked up.

Dr.Danger, Hasta la victoria siempre!

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Ben Wojdyla — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:32:52 EDT

@BMWCARL: You say that like its a bad thing.

Ben Wojdyla

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Fitty7lax — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:32:15 EDT

Not a bad truck. I wish the payload was higher, but otherwise, this is a pretty serious four wheeler. Do the hubs lock front and rear?

Fitty7lax

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Meat Farley — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:31:50 EDT

No thanks.

Gimme one of these.

Meat Farley

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

BMWCARL — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:28:29 EDT

Wow will you guys review anything that automakers give you the keys to?

BMWCARL

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Pete Gaines — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:25:48 EDT

So...why don't they just drop a V8 in a GMC Canyon and call it a day?

Pete Gaines

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Feds — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:19:43 EDT

Can someone do up a comparison of cost/capability/economy of this vs. a Z71 pickup? Because unless I am missing something, it's a way to spend a lot of money to look like someone with no sense, length, or girth.

Feds

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

jeremyc — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:16:36 EDT

I sure hope acceleration is healthy, with a 300hp v8 and 4.10 final drive. Wonder what the rpms are at 65mph.

jeremyc

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

JHK — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:13:29 EDT

Walker, texas ranger?
Excellent photos. The photographs accompanying the reviews have improved so much in the last few months.

JHK

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

mofoturbo — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:13:13 EDT

I like some of the compositions of the later images, but it looks like someone broke out the Hummer® Ugly Stick and went postal on that thing.

mofoturbo

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

Ash78 — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:08:23 EDT

So is this something Hummer is actually going to offer, or is it a one-off tuning shop creation? I didn't quite understand that from the intro.

Sweet pics, sounds like a fun time!

Ash78

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

POLAЯ — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:08:08 EDT

It's the HUMMER H3T "That is Fully Erect!" Edition.

POLAЯ

2009 Hummer H3T Alpha, Part One

stevecmh — Mon, 24 Mar 2008 12:07:05 EDT

it looks pretty cool at night..
i like it.
i wish it got better MPGS.. Diesel...

stevecmh