Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw - Jalopnik Comments

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Littlebitsofpaper — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 00:20:00 EST

Not my fave Orlando hangout but I knew a few girls who worked there - not Brandy tho ...

Littlebitsofpaper

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Pat_McRotch — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 21:18:41 EST

@SavageATL: @Novaload:

As a Storm driver, who's sister actualy drives a V6 Camaro. ouch.

Pat_McRotch

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

NovaloadMissesPolar — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 20:18:40 EST

@sliderule: HA! Grotesque but extremely funny!

Let's see--stripper + dumbass car + living at home + afraid of daddy + daddy is a cop + a lie even my cat would detect in a split second = 6 kinds of Loser!! That must be close to a record!

NovaloadMissesPolar

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

petersterncan — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 17:09:14 EST

@Adamskiy: Yeah, talk about things you wouldn't think could go together.

petersterncan

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

yellofury * * * * * — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 15:32:56 EST

@Cobden: shudders
good things its dark in strip joints
coz thats some buttah

yellofury * * * * *

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

RoninianHoon — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 14:45:31 EST

Another single digit IQ stripper...

RoninianHoon

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

mytdawg — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 14:37:22 EST

A 27 year old stripper named Brandy that lives at home, drives a Storm, has a cop for a dad, and is afraid of getting kicked out of the house.

She's not doing it right.

mytdawg

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Vintage Racer is out taking pictures — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 14:10:46 EST

From her Myspace page, her friend Cinnabar (hmmm... what does she do for a living??) is fairly hot.

Vintage Racer is out taking pictures

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

TheTooth — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 13:51:10 EST

@beercheck: What does the sea have to do with this?

TheTooth

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Wed, 27 Feb 2008 13:36:25 EST

You guys are terrible!
The poor girl's probably just trying to earn money to go to College.
(It's amazing how many peelers are in College!)
I mean... do you think she enjoys Lap Dancing, being groped, and earning those little extras in the VIP room from all the off-duty cops that go in there? Ya know, the ones who probably work under her father!!
That would be kinda funny actually... Who's the Deputy now, BITCH?
SLURP SMACK SLURP SLURP SMACK SLURP SLURP SMACK SLURP SLURP SMACK

POLAЯ is taking his work underground. He can't let it fall into the wrong hands again!

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Iron-Balls McGinty — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 13:17:00 EST

And Daddy's a deputy.
Beautiful.

Iron-Balls McGinty

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

beercheck — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 13:16:46 EST

@SeanKHotay: FTW. WTF, WFTV?

beercheck

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

SeanKHotay — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 13:10:40 EST

Wait a minute...WFTV got it wrong...

Brandy, aka Poleshaker, got bonked in the back of the head with a rock by Geo so Magneto could abduct Storm for his attack on the Institute...

X-Men #1046

SeanKHotay

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

workingonyourinvoice — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 13:10:20 EST

@Bento: Right.... Years...

workingonyourinvoice

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

SavageATL — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:55:41 EST

Apparently she lacks the stripper talent to upgrade to a v-6 Camaro. The Geo is like, I want so badly to be slutty enough to be a v-6 Camaro! keep trying, Brandy.

SavageATL

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

JHJVJR — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:53:11 EST

She must be terrible at her job if she drives a Geo Storm.

JHJVJR

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Cobden — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:52:10 EST

Winehouse got a visa?

Cobden

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Capt. Mazda Sisko — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:49:25 EST

oops...i saw "stripper" and "jacking" in the title and thought this story was going in a different direction.

Capt. Mazda Sisko

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Mysterious Utility Bento — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:44:00 EST

@m3_of_doom: I've been in the spaceship and it has a funny old cheese smell to it. Mons always seemed to have a better quality of stripper IMHO, but its been years since I've been there

Mysterious Utility Bento

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

m3_of_doom — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:41:10 EST

@Bento: oh no way...2001 Odyssey tops Mons...its got a friggin spaceship for chrissakes!

m3_of_doom

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

sliderule — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:40:21 EST

Yeah, "get off me dad, yer crushin me smokes".

sliderule

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

brianddd — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:29:06 EST

A stripper that talks to her Dad? No way.

brianddd

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

rlj676 — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:23:49 EST

@PeteJayhawk:

Her grandma even has a myspace page it would seem. Holy crap, am I the only person that doesn't get this myspace thing?

Maybe the curfew of 1 am or whatever was actually for Brandy's son, who was waiting in the car while mommy shook her pastied business to support their McDonald's habit.

Either way, I'd look at her naked.

rlj676

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Morphine — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:23:32 EST

It would figure that the best excuse a drunk stripper could think of on short notice had something to do with jacking.

Morphine

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:22:56 EST

@beercheck: She's (You're) a Fine Girl!

POLAЯ is taking his work underground. He can't let it fall into the wrong hands again!

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

DoctorNine — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:17:50 EST

Did the topless dancer have the topless Metro?
I mean, you know, to balance the cosmos...

DoctorNine

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

beercheck — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:14:15 EST

She sounds like a fine girl. Would make a good wife. But, alas, I already have a life, a love, and a lady.

beercheck

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

beercheck — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:12:48 EST

POLAR: Cue Looking Glass rewrite.

beercheck

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

amblito — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:11:02 EST

@htrodblder: Cornish or Cheese and Onion?

amblito

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Pete Gaines — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:10:50 EST

Hmmm...

[profile.myspace.com]

Pete Gaines

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

commander205 — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:10:32 EST

Gawd. Did you guys go to the article and see the stripper? Must be a shallow pool there in Orlando. She couldn't get a job here in Birmingham.

commander205

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Mysterious Utility Bento — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:09:26 EST

@FightingChance: Thats why peeps went to Lollipops in Daytona or Tampa, the East Coast mecca of strip joints! All Hail Mons Venus!

Mysterious Utility Bento

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

htrodblder — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 12:00:13 EST

Its a strip club that requires "pasties"? Well that just changes everything.

htrodblder

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Seth L — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:58:58 EST

The Geo Storm is nicest thing about this article.

Seth L

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:55:20 EST

Sometimes ya just know what they do by name:

Mandy,
Cinnamon,
Misty,
Cherry,
Amber,
Angel,
Brandy,
Crystal,
Mercedes,
Candy...

Your parents cursed you!

POLAЯ is taking his work underground. He can't let it fall into the wrong hands again!

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

DonSchenck — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:42:18 EST

@Adamskiy: ... driving a Geo Storm ...

DonSchenck

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

VonPinto — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:42:09 EST

Only in Florida... And maybe West Virginia.

VonPinto

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

FLB — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:42:00 EST

@htrodblder: Personally, I'm waiting for the animated version.

FLB

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

chrystlubitshi — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:41:56 EST

oh, whew... i saw the word 'jacking' in the title and was afraid this was going to be somehow related to something awful's top story yesterday

(note... i still read it anyways... i have me some intellerjins)

chrystlubitshi

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Matt Hardigree — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:39:51 EST

To quote Chris Rock: If your daughter grew up to be a stripper, you fucked up.

Matt Hardigree

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Drujon — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:38:18 EST

"Now Brandy I want you home as soon as you're done having creepy old men push ratty one dollar bills in and around your privates." "And see if you can score daddy some 'tina' at the club."

Drujon

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

68stang — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:36:59 EST

Aramskiy. Beat me to it. You can't write irony like this.

68stang

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

FightingChance — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:35:21 EST

Haha, Dancer's Royale at the corner of 436 and 50. Finest strip club/americana eatery I know of.

Also, would you believe Orange county ordinance requires bottoms *and* pasties?

FightingChance

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

Adamskiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiy — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:34:41 EST

A 27-year-old. Stripper. Living at home. With a curfew.

Adamskiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiy

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

htrodblder — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:32:38 EST

Since the writers strike is over I'm seeing a movie of the week, followed by a "Crime Scene Strippers" layout in Playboy.

htrodblder

Stripper Gets Drunk, Covers With Car Jacking Story - Geo Storm Only Flaw

General Halfshaftery — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 11:32:09 EST

A stripper with a curfew.

General Halfshaftery