Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions - Jalopnik Comments

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

AuricTech — Sun, 10 Feb 2008 13:16:51 EST

@burglar: That's not just lipstick on a pig, that's giving the pig the whole Tammy Faye Bakker treatment.

AuricTech

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Meatwave — Sat, 09 Feb 2008 16:09:12 EST

Well, the tuner guys are gonna have to come up with some new kinda style now that it's main stream. Aww... too bad!

Meatwave

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 18:45:31 EST

@crazygutgut: maybe... if they are in the US, then most likely.

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

crazygutgut — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 17:11:51 EST

@Citizen Braff: so are all the gluckers I searched in google related to you? there lots of other glucks (notably Alma and Christoph Willibald) but I dont seem to be related since our name was changed at some point...

crazygutgut

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 17:06:01 EST

@lemondriver: classic

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

lemondriver — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 16:58:59 EST

@Citizen Braff: "I have a pizza here for a Mr. Asswipe Johnson..."

"It's OSS-SWEEP-PAY!!!"

/Sat Nite Live.

lemondriver

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 16:47:46 EST

@crazygutgut: HAHA...
My family are the only Gluckers in the states I believe...

I should have been a rapper, I could work my last name in so easily into every rhyme...

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

crazygutgut — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 15:43:07 EST

@Citizen Braff:
ha ha I need that poster!!
Yeah I used to get teased A lot in elementary school, the only thing that saved me was Matt Kenis moved to my school...
we need a "gluck" club...

crazygutgut

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 14:00:49 EST

This was just emailed to me and I think its relevant...

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 14:00:28 EST

@crazygutgut: yeah the creative way is to remove the GL and add an F... no one has ever done that before...

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Triborough — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 13:52:23 EST

Dub makes the Russians look like they have good taste!

Triborough

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Novaload — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 13:49:39 EST

Tragically stupid, tragically uncool.

Novaload

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

slowjoecrow — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 13:26:43 EST

"Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public."

slowjoecrow

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Seth L — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 13:23:08 EST

I've run out of vomit, may I borrow some of yours?

Seth L

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

crazygutgut — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 13:19:50 EST

@LuciferV8:
no the accepted term (as I established a half hour ago, is Re-DONK-ulous

crazygutgut

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

LuciferV8 — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 13:18:21 EST

@RoninianHoon: I'd just simply call it ridiculous.

LuciferV8

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

crazygutgut — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 13:15:09 EST

@Citizen Braff: seriously? Glucker? I never heard that except when people were making fun of me...

crazygutgut

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Unevolved: Whoop! — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 13:11:07 EST

That jeep makes me die a little inside every time I look at it... Forever doomed to a life of ugliness, never to see a trail or ounce of mud again...

So sad.

Unevolved: Whoop!

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

MustaineGT — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 13:11:03 EST

@Dr.Danger:

You've done enough. Many thanks.

MustaineGT

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

RoninianHoon — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 13:08:16 EST

Paint is cool but the rims are gaudy and ridiculous.

RoninianHoon

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

RoninianHoon — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 13:07:45 EST

How can you call a 30' a dub? Shouldn't it be Trub mag now? I can't remember the last time I saw 20's in their mag.

RoninianHoon

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

stevecmh — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 13:02:26 EST

that sebring is ugly

stevecmh

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

graverobber- Same great taste, new low price! — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:54:48 EST

I have a frequent house guest who always rents a car from the cheapest place around- usually Fox- and almost always ends up with a Sebring or the Dodge counterpart.

The interior is monumentally cheesy, even by rental car standards, with even the ignition switch having a soft-rubbery feel when turned. The whole car gives off the impression that all Chrysler has done is re-bodied old k-cars from the 80s that they picked up off of Craigslist.

The worst thing about them is the fact that when you lock the door, whether by using the key in the lock, or the button on the fob, the horn blasts at full volume. Is there any way to turn that off short of fully disabling the horn, or leaving the car unlocked?

What a bunch of crap.

graverobber- Same great taste, new low price!

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

dancote — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:48:11 EST

I ... like big wheels and I cannot lie

dancote

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:36:27 EST

@slackinfux: Except none of their cars can actually corner... SNAP!

Outside these walls, people say Bling Bling... but here inside the walls of this AutoShow... We call it Bling Bang...

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

UDMan — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:34:55 EST

@poxpopulus: Every time I see one of these 70's convertibles that look like this, I want to hang their creator by the balls. What the hell.....

UDMan

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

slackinfux — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:31:56 EST

It's official, DUB corners the market on UGLY!

slackinfux

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:29:48 EST

I prefer the flat black trend to the DUBification of these ve-hickles...

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:27:20 EST

@JoSCh: HOLLA!

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:27:08 EST

@crazygutgut: Glucker

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Mad_Science — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:26:59 EST

@FatBraff: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

It's like seeing a mistreated dog chained up in someone's yard. Go back and rescue it!

Mad_Science

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

charles_barrett — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:24:40 EST

@poxpopulus: I hope the 40" wheel sets come with a coordinating ladder...

charles_barrett

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Maymar — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:22:21 EST

Just think of it this way, every DUBed out Sebring is another B or G body saved from this treatment. And I'm not saying I like this, but these seem to be well done examples of the trend (inasmuch as giant slabs of chrome can be appealing). Most of the craptacularity is on Chrysler's end.

Maymar

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

timrussell — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:21:12 EST

@Dr.Danger: LMAO, Well said.

timrussell

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

JoSCh — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:16:21 EST

@FatBraff: Turnin is fo suckas. Chuck it in da guttah and go buy anothah!

JoSCh

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Dr.Danger's got it all — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:13:50 EST

I was going to do more, but im too tired.

Dr.Danger's got it all

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

johnnyichiban — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:10:36 EST

@FatBraff:

Tuned 240Z = AWESOME

johnnyichiban

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

crazygutgut — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:09:48 EST

@poxpopulus:
Im a coining a new phrase right now.
Redonkulous...

crazygutgut

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

crazygutgut — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:08:22 EST

@FatBraff:
it is my last name! now I have to kill you...
are you a Glick? in the 1890s our last name was either Gliick or Glück but written in cursive its hard to tell...

crazygutgut

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:07:24 EST

@poxpopulus: what happens when you want to turn?

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:06:48 EST

@cyclopticgaze: No WAY... You see so-called "playas" driving the dumbest shit around...

How many pimped out 4-door, 4-cyl accords do you see on the road? TONS of them...

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

poxpopulus — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:06:35 EST

30"s are for pussies; now 40"..........

[i11.photobucket.com]

poxpopulus

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Scott — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 12:02:09 EST

@ash78: "no such thing as objectively bad taste or poor financial decision-making"

Wrong.

Are you seeing the pictures above?

Scott

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

cyclopticgaze — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:52:17 EST

There isn't one true playa out there who would be caught dead rolling dirty in a fucking Sebring.

Maybe a white guy. . . .

cyclopticgaze

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:51:46 EST

@bmrfile: Here is one for you... Jeep Wrangler on 30's

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

NICKNICK — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:42:53 EST

@ash78: underrepresented? then who's always rep-re-sent-in?
oh no you di'int!

NICKNICK

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

BMRFILE — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:40:27 EST

@UDMAN: never thought they can make the entire Chrysler line uglier...but we're all wrong.

Wow, I guess there a lot of people looking for ways to make their cars into total slugs, complete with non-compliant ride and bent suspension components. Let's drop the already sub-par gas mileage on Jeep vehicles to even lower figures.

But the icing on the cake. Your car looks silly and you look like a tool driving it.

BMRFILE

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

UDMan — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:37:05 EST

@FatBraff: Are you saying that this Nitro really BLOWS?

UDMan

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:35:06 EST

@crazygutgut: what is gluck.net? that is really close to my last name...

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:34:10 EST

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

crazygutgut — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:30:33 EST

and just to prove that DUB isnt doing anything different
heres a picture of a Chrysler 300 Dub was touring around in 2005!!
[www.gluck.net]
Lambo Door Kit? CHECK!
Black Paint? CHECK!
Big Wheels? CHECK!
DUB Sticker? CHECK!
okay. NEXT!!!

crazygutgut

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

diskreet — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:29:21 EST

DUB Magazine: Because bored frat boys need something to look at when they aren't buying roofies and drugging high school girls.

diskreet

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

EMPM, Esq. — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:28:59 EST

Nothin' says class like Dub
... or is it nothing says class like Donk? I get confused sometimes.

EMPM, Esq.

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Dr.Danger's got it all — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:28:25 EST

@ash78: You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everyone else, and we are all part of the same compost pile.

Dr.Danger's got it all

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

UDMan — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:24:58 EST

What's really sad is the banner. One of the "customs" illustrated is a Jeep Wrangler. The only way to customize a Wrangler is with Mud!

UDMan

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Ash78 — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:24:02 EST

@NICKNICK: Modern society doesn't really differentiate between the two, especially among the noncompetitive classes (often referred to as underprivileged or underrepresented).

Remember, we are all unique snowflakes with every right to express ourselves in every way possible and there is no such thing as objectively bad taste or poor financial decision-making. It's all subjective.

/rant off

Ash78

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

RalphieDC — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:21:09 EST

@Miscellanea: People who buy DUB can read?

RalphieDC

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Paul Y. is Going Dumb at the Sideshow — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:20:20 EST

@ash78: Zing!

Who greenlights this crap to actually be built?

Besides, if you're not rollin' on 42"s, you are a FAILURE. These cars aren't even half-trying.

Paul Y. is Going Dumb at the Sideshow

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

NICKNICK — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:20:15 EST

I pity the fool who can't differentiate between "different" and "better."

NICKNICK

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

FatBraff — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:19:03 EST

I used to work with a guy who was in the "import/export" biz between the US and Japan..
He had 2 H2s... one was lifted with 35" tires, the other was lowered on 26" rims...

I gave him a pass though because he also had an F355 and a modified 240Z that was one of the best sounding cars I have ever heard (triple carbed)...

FatBraff

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Parramore64 — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:18:31 EST

Some help me understand the appeal of this styling. I've always been baffled -- especially since millions of people love this kind of thing.

Parramore64

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Ash78 — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:18:07 EST

I'm no latin scholar, but allow me to quote an SAT prep manual:

"When you see the dub-, you should remember the word doubt"

Ash78

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

UDMan — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:17:34 EST

Never thought they could make the Sebring more ugly. I was wrong.

UDMan

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

cgarison — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:16:42 EST

Now I have seen the answer to the question that nobody cared to ask.

And does that Nitro have an afterburner poked out its butt?

cgarison

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

burglar — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:15:52 EST

I once saw a contrasting *pair* of dubbed out Azteks cruising a Detroit freeway. I honestly couldn't decide what joke to make.

burglar

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Hoser Dave — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:15:51 EST

I bet I see at least 39 of those rolling down Gratiot by summer.

Hoser Dave

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

beercheck — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:11:43 EST

Pentabortion. Tastelessly delicious!

beercheck

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Miscellanea — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:06:28 EST

People still read DUB?!

Miscellanea

Chicago Auto Show: Dub Magazine Turns Chryslers Into Pentabortions

Unevolved: Whoop! — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 11:05:07 EST

"highlighting the understated beauty of lightly customized automobiles?"

Well played, sirs.

Unevolved: Whoop!