<![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine? - Jalopnik Comments]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine? - Jalopnik Comments]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> 1956 chev convertable. Top down, leg room you see.Total master of direction. You gota love the girl!!

mtchndjnmtch

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> 70 Wildcat convertible with a 455. All the good Cutlass convertibles are gone.

propstrike

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Pink Caddilac. "We don't have to drive it, we can park it out in back ..."

PaperBoy

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> A black 1982 Lamborghini Countach LP500S equipped with super rad rear wing and cocaine.

TheHamBeast

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Interesting thread, interesting girl. Not knowing her, I think she's smokin' hot but probably wouldn't like my BMW 318is or my Sunbeam Alpine. Or me, probably. So to impress her I'll wear a tuxedo and take a British Racing Green Series 1 Jaguar XJ12--with Minilite wheels and 6 weber downdrafts to give about 4 miles per gallon. British class, a nice leather backseat, a hot girl and a V12...what's not to like?

And yes, darling, I'm available if you like Sunbeam Alpines.

Armand Bengle

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> This *IS* a mixer...we've had a few hook-ups already!

Me? I'll pass; she's not my type (more the mousey brunette or bookish redhead).

SeanKHotay

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> I'd pick my new (to me) Dodge minivan

Wood is warm, but woodgrain is hot!!!

KenManiac

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> All day I've been ignoring this weak threadbait, but I'll bite: 1969 F100 with the vinyl seats so I can hose it out afterwards. If necessary.

Fly I-80

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @Novaload:

I know one Sir Reverend Gonzo myself.

5cents

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]>
If the smart fortwo doesn't drive her away, that oughtta.

Hyman Decent

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Chrysler Cordoba (preferably a second generation model with t-tops) - the Corinthian leather will totally make me seem like a smoother and classier guy than I really am.

Or a Peel P50 - I'm betting on striking out, so may as well make some part of the night memorable.

Maymar is convinced M.C. Escher engineered his car

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> either a divvy van so you can hose it down, or a private jet (that you can also hose down, with petrol, then burn the petrol).
both vehicles equipped with vibrating heart shaped waterbeds.

GreenVanMan

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @5cents: Uh, you do know that's Hunter S Thompson, Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas, right?

NovaloadMissesPolar

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Mazda Miata, with a copy of the Carma Sutra stuck under the passenger seat. Curiosity should drive her to see if some of the more creative things are truly possible, and I will be there to help her with her research.

vinnchan

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> TAXI, dude

let someone else clean up the BARF!!

i've done my share of chicks that look spookily like that one, and ....

plus you can stick her in the taxi for a return trip OUTTA your HAIR once she's done...

wheels OF satan!

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @danms6: Good save

grrgle

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @Tanshanomi: Clever, sir, but hardly correct.

TroubleonWheels

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @danms6: Yeah, maybe.

Jonny Lieberman

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @jonnylieberman: Of course, you think I have a shot?

danms6

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @danms6: You know that Tracie is a real human being who reads what you write, right?

Jonny Lieberman

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @jonnylieberman:

"Yet with a trunk big enough for two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high powered blotter acid, a salt shaker half full of cocaine, a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers... Also a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of beer, a pint of raw ether and two dozen amyls." = eloquent & informed.

Most certainly a good thing.

5cents

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> A girl like this doesn't deserve a 'date'. She deserves to be giving me road head as I snort blow off her ass crack. Behind the wheel of a black 1989 Buick GNX.

Honestly, I've never dated a chick half as crazy as this one. But I'm accepting applications.

danms6

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Holy Crap, what a day to be busy at work.

138 comments and no one's brought up yesterday's 308?

WTF?

Based on what lanispet said it seems like an even better match to my description yesterday.

Mad_Science

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @Vintage Racer: Just be sure to pump the tires up to 100psi. They're experimental, you know.

Brian B

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Westfalia Camper Van. Because the wife probably would not appreciate my P in some strange V.

F50F60

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> A 1995 Chevrolet S-10

Because that's what I got....

mytdawg

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Perfect use of a Thompson quote. I love this site even more now.

Catie

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> The A-Team Van with a stash of Hannibal's cigars. Until I save up the funds, my rusty '79 El Camino and a pack of Marlboro Reds will have to suffice.

TheBrudwich

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @clank-o-tron:
Sorry ladies, already spoken for: [www.laurabillingham.com]

Al Navarro

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> I didn't even have to think twice about this one.
Cadillac.
Fleetwood 76 Brougham.
Black, as if they came in any other color.
The longest Cadillac ever made [excluding limos].
And I'd hire an inscrutable driver for the occasion.

[call me, S.M.]

biminitwst

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> This got me thinkin'... does Jezebel have a QOTD? Will tomorrow's be "What would you wear on a Date with Jalopnik's Al Navarro?"

clank-o-tron

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> A flat black Checker Marathon - a hint of Goth weirdness and a back seat that can't be beat.

Automanic

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @rlj676: I went out with a guy who drove a 911. I loved that car and he gave me the best oral sex of my life (see Jezebel oral thread going on now). I need to contact him...

NOLA girl

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> I love this girl Tracie Egan. She is nuts. She is really crazy, bless Jesus for this nutty!

gordiva

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @Heep: Good catch! It certainly is. All I wanted back when I had my white '96 sedan was a black '96 coupe. As long as I got to keep my V6.

A strolling player, now with 100% more Studebaker!

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> This is so easy I'm ashamed at myself for even writing it: Ford Probe.

jnostalgics

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> 1968 Impala SS Convertible

GameBreaker

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> 1978 Buick Elektra - crushed red velour interior. Back seat big enough to get your freak on any way yawaana.

guruscotty

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @bzr: Wow. Ministry, even.

SBJ

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @lanispet: Now that shows the knowledge that only time and experience can provide. I think you win.

mytdawg

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> The Challenger in "From Dusk to Dawn" You forgot a Glock and 1911.

vonShine

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> a dolorean.

The_Brain

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @lanispet: Hmm, I own one of those...

JayP71

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @skaz: I was about to say the exact same thing but you beat me to it.

brandonvalentine

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> This girl terrifies me. Thus, I must drive the most terrifying car ever. A Pontiac Aztek, because an 80s Camaro is too obvious.

Failing that, I'm stealing contender's ChomskyMobile. With my Ministry album on repeat.

bzr

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Ex-contractor GMC Safari with a mattress in the back and carpet on the walls, maybe some blacklighting in the back. painted with colour-shifting paint and with a bumper sticker that says "if this vans a rockin' don't come a knocking."

Evil-Jeremy

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> 1965 Lincoln 4 door sled, black on black, dark tinted windows, on the ground with True Spoke wires. The back seat is the size of a stuido apartment and a family of four could live in the trunk.

48pan2

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Ooof, she lost me at "I need prescribed meds to deal with the bacteria that takes up shop in between my legs. I might have maxed out my usage on that shit, as I'm aware one can build up tolerances to antibiotics." Gonna have to go with "borrowing" a police cruiser, with a back seat designed for disinfection.

lanispet

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @Hyman Decent: So I guess I would borrow a smart fortwo — there'd be a good chance she wouldn't even set foot in the car.

Hyman Decent

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> The obvious car of choice for any kind of transporting of loose women is a mid/late 90s Chevy caprice that way at least those around you know your getting some based on the fact you got her (drunken and in the heat) attention based on your smooth talkin personality rather then your car is totally teh awesome and your using it to compensate for something whatever that may be. Preferably white with chrome 22s and a slight but noticeable burning of the oil smoke out the tailpipe.

TheAstronot

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> I'd take for a spin in my bright and shiny new ariel atom 300. then dump her on the next intersection, cuz my ariel is way too fly - even for a supercat like that... dull, ain't it? guess marriage has it's drawbacks on the male genepool afterall...

fooster

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> As Groucho Marx supposedly said or wrote, I don't want to join any club that would have me as a member.

Hyman Decent

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Preferably something with a front bench seat and a floor shifter. She could shift while still having full use of her hands while sitting in the middle jump seat. And I'd still be able drive (albeit somewhat excitedly). Fun for all involved.

Joetimek

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @5cents: That's a good thing, right?

Jonny Lieberman

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Winner!

That is so "inside" that it can only be bettered if you somehow incorporated a 'mino or Bruce reference.

Al Navarro

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> 90 minutes ago, I didn't know Tracie Egan existed; now I feel like I need to take a shower. Could we PLEASE go back to just talking about camshafts?

At least for a little while?

Tanshanomi

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Being a dragon, I much more interested in which car SHE'S driving.

b.borrman

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @flackette:

The problem is some cars which are so fun to drive might convey that message without it being the intent. A yellow hummer is not such a car, a 911 is.

rlj676-new job, same problems

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> [edit:] southEast DC (doh!). -or Bankhead Hwy in SW Atlanta for that matter.
-prospect of QOTD so disgusting I threw up in my mouth a little and temporarily lost sense of direction.

wonkydonky

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> I guess the question becomes "What does the slut machine drive?" which makes for all kinds of interesting possibilities.

mytdawg

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @Tanshanomi: Hey now. Some of know our car stuff.
My boyfriend is regularly freaked out by my car conversations.

Flackette is a Red State Elitist

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> As a woman-person and certifiable car nut, I would like to suggest you NOT drive anything that screams "I wanna get laid, please please can I huh?".

Flackette is a Red State Elitist

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Hit the tequila hard until dark, grab a brick from the yard, head for the nearest car showrooms and say 'choose'.

Kuang

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Nice Hunter S. Thompsonish lead in. She might well want to be driven by a Samoan, but I think a Peterbuilt would be more appropriate.

smokeydog001

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> 1972 Cadillac ElDorado convertable, for the obvious reasons (back seat for the slowbies).

TheMadAdder

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @WorkingOnYourInvoice:

Adding in your Nathan Explosion image, I see we are cut from the same cloth.

ProfessorFate

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @hugnkiss: I can see it now. Some Jalopnik would mention "CAFE standards" and one of you would agree that Starbucks is really slipping nowadays.

Tanshanomi

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Whichever one of my pieces of shit ran at the time.

I don't need to impress anybody.

skaz

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Mr. Liberman, your commentary is outrageous and informed.

5cents

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> BTTF DeLorean, in case I need to go back in time after it's all over.

If there's no do-overs, I'm going to go with an Audi AllRoad or an '89 Volvo 240DL.

tcabeen

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @Al Navarro: I'm a big proponent of the cross-posting. I love, love, love my Jezzies, but things on all the Gawker media blogs can get a little insular after awhile. Rock on, Jalopniks.

hugnkiss

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> 66 GTO, flat black of course.

RalphieDC

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @ProfessorFate: ha HA! See comment #11. We should hang out sometime.

workingonyourinvoice

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @Vintage Racer: We have a winner. Why did the obviously correct answer take so long?

(Though, the SM is a close second)

Zandr

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Australian Ford XB Falcon in full Mad Max II (the Road Warrior) guise.

ProfessorFate

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @nowimpissed: For some reason, I have Bob Seager's lyric, "I used her, she used me, but neither one cared" running through my head.

Tanshanomi

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @hugnkiss:
At such a mixer, I think we'd all be looking over at the cool New York kids from Gawker and be scheming how to steal their cars and clothes.

---
FWIW, I think cross-posting more in the future is a good thing. Like in my college women's studies classes when everyone would turn to me or the other token male in the room and ask "So Al, what do guys think?" (I'm assuming the readership of Jez/Jal are pretty much opposite in terms of gender percentage.)

Al Navarro

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @nowimpissed: How about a late 60's/early 70's 98 convertible?

with tilt wheel...

How's that for full circle?

mytdawg

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @eltonito:

Shhhhhh. Don't tell him that. We need someone with a car who will make Hagen Daas runs for us during the slumber party.

nowimpissed

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @hugnkiss: No thanks. I already waste too much time on Jalopnik. It's not you, it's me.

Andrewpetty

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @eltonito: We'll have to work on that Jalopnik/Jezebel mixer. I'm sure there's a high school gym available somewhere. I'm envisioning two scenarios:

a)Jezebelles on one side of the gym talking Britney Spears and Jalopniks on the other discussing cam shafts.
b)Or, we all hit the punch bowl a little too hard and get in a fistfight.

hugnkiss

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> I was thinking something along the lines of Austin Powers' Shaguar or Wooderson's Chevelle from Dazed and Confused, since we're on a Matthew McConaughey kick today. Alright, alright, alright.

apuesto

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Y'all best pack some mad heat to fight the Jezzie Lezzies off when they come to steal Slut Machine away from you. Just sayin'. It could be war, yo.

SBJ

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @eltonito: Hey, I can always carry their books and do their homework...

Nope, never been THAT guy ;)

mytdawg

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @hugnkiss: You should go back and read my post about Velma. I think it pretty well embodies misunderstood indierock nerdiness.

eltonito

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @Al Navarro: Don't forget the ether.

Buckster

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @nowimpissed: Ouch. I've been that guy and it doesn't end well, at least for the guy. Sure, there's girls, but after 3 months of listening to them talk about other guys you start to realize you are so completely emasculated that you are considered another one of the girls. In fact, you're the girl that doesn't have sex or go out on dates who is always home when they need to have a good cry.

Escape Mytdawg, escape that slumberparty while you still can!!!

eltonito

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @nowimpissed: You're scaring me and that turns me on.

@hugnkiss: Slightly misunderstood nerdy thing... Nope, I don't think there's a lot of confusion about it. It's a pretty well understood nerdy thing mixed with a pseudo-intellectual biker-with-no-tattoos-or-felonies... thing.

Train wreck pretty well covers it.

mytdawg

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> 91' Merc Cougar SC Coupe. (Cheap and Fast)

Buckster

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @eltonito: Good observation! More shots like that, and I might have to take a number to get on that list of potential executions!

POLAЯMISSESEVEЯYBODY

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> I read the article about how she paid somebody to rape her and it went to shit from what was a questionable idea at best.

Quick synopsis for those that can't go there - She paid a guy to fantasy "rape" her, he got off too fast and then he got all clingy and wouldn't go away. What a train wreck. I like her.

mytdawg

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Or the Citroen from yesterday? This is definitely not a job for the 308.

Fitty7lax

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> A 66 Eldoarado convertible with the ghost of HST in the back.

Vintage Racer is out taking pictures

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @mytdawg: Right.

Jonny Lieberman

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Early Manx. With an old Beetle motor running the biggest goddamn pulley I can find.

Fitty7lax

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> I would drive a "good" car like the Prius as an offset to any immoral and potentially illegal in certain southern states activity that might occur later in the date.

Also, for all of those suggesting station wagons or other pseudo mattress cars, a gentleman would pay for a room at Red Roof Inn.

no_slushbox

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @dolo54: You better believe that's a paddling.

Jonny Lieberman

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @eltonito, Andrewpetty, Tocsin: You upstanding gents should hang out on Jezebel more often. If any of you have a slightly misunderstood nerdy thing going on, all the better.

hugnkiss

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> I couldn't get a very good look at the photos as I'm at work, but I'm pretty sure the answer is a black boat-tail Riv with a 50/50 paint job and mis-matched tires.

badco/LoJ

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @mytdawg:

"I couldn't get laid in a monkey whorehouse with a truck load of bananas."

Awwwwe. Funny, self-depricating remarks like that might actually get you laid over on Jezebel. Well, actually, we'd probably just tossel your hair lovingly and tell you remind us of our brothers. But you'd get to hang out with lots of pretty girls . . . so that's nice.

nowimpissed

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @UDMAN: Wood. Ha. Jokes.

Andrewpetty

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @dolo54: If you base the possibility of sex on the appearance of nose, you're doing it wrong.

mytdawg

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> BMW Isetta.

piththeelder

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @dolo54: I always take time out of an entertaining, hypothetical situation involving a female no one will probably ever meet to comment on how unattractive she is, but I didn't really feel like being an asshole today so I passed on it.

eltonito

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> A 1983 Subaru BRAT. Murdered out. She stays in the jump seat.

Menik

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> An ambulance, so I can head straight to the hospital to get my thing checked out immediately afterwards.

Tanshanomi

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @UDMAN: This is backfiring.

Jonny Lieberman

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Heck, a '70's conversion van should do - any make with shag carpeted walls, captain chairs and the ubiquitous bed in the back...;-)

fawgcutter

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Two words:

El.
Camino.

Any year, any condition.

wannabewannabe

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Cutlass with T-Tops.

Rattletrap

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Guys you need to look at some of her pics... [jezebel.com] I would not touch that nose with my manhood, even if I was single... okay maybe in the drunken blur of the 3 weeks following a breakup, but you know, any other time.

dolo54

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> For those who care about this sort of thing, OneD is extremely NSFW. But funny as hell.

And for the record, I was going to make this question include Choire of Gawker, but thought that that would be a bridge too far for some.

I think whomever said Lindsay's SL 65 is on the right track, I think.

---
Double wow, Jonny. Though I hope that the commenters don't hate me after this is all said and done!?!

Al Navarro

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @PatFromGundo: At least you're consistent.

Mannequin99

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> F355 Spider while she does lines of coke off my manhood.

snep

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Honda Element. Something about hosing off the interior appeals to me.

Mannequin99

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> I hate to bust any bubbles, but girls who are publicly very sexual are often completely boring in bed, whereas "nice", shy girls are often freakazoids in bed. Oh, and I'm going with pedicab.

dolo54

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @Ed D: The DS is far too dainty to take on a woman of this caliber.

This date calls for the Citroën Slut Machine, I mean... S&M... err... Citroën SM.

eltonito

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @Andrewpetty:
I was going to say that. I'd show up in my rusted Vauxhall Viva and pray to every deity I can think of that I survive the night with all the original bits I had when I left home. I can be a pretty raucous partier at times, I'm considered the drunken imbecile in my group of friends. But...

This girl makes me look like a lightweight, a nancyboy, and scares the crap outta me.

On a somewhat related note, I really like things that scare me / might kill me (Hence the shitbox Vauxhall Viva, that car has tried to murder me since I was twelve.)

Madness (Possibly Sparta, maybe baggy trousers.)

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> A vintage rat rod, loud, with a big engine, and it shoots fire...

RoninianHoon

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Nick Hogan's smashed up P***y Magnet.

POLAЯMISSESEVEЯYBODY

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @LTDScott: It fits all the qualifications. Big trunk, big back seat, lots of room for her to stretch out in the front seat.

I actually have no illusion even a slut would do me but I do like them cars. I couldn't get laid in a monkey whorehouse with a truck load of bananas.

mytdawg

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @DokterDitka: I concur... only I'd expand that to either a Chevy Kingswood or a Plymouth Sport Suburban, and they all have to have fake wood paneling..... to go with the real wood inside!

UDMan

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> A jeep. Probably need the traction.

NovaloadMissesPolar

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @Evander: Zing!

Jonny Lieberman

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Drive? Why?

peakay

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @mytdawg: ..for more head room.

LTDScott, Porcubimmer pilot

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Just to show my money's where my mouth is: The Voisin C28.

PatFromGundo

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @clank-o-tron: Wait... a Subaru... or the other STI? Or both?

LTDScott, Porcubimmer pilot

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> I would pass and let Bill Maher, Bobby Brown and Ron Jeremy take her for a late supper to Camden or Southwest DC driving this van: [www.cardomain.com]

wonkydonky

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Late 60's/early 70's Olds 98 convertible.

with tilt wheel.

heh.

mytdawg

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> I would either shit my pants or be too scared to shit my pants if I had to entertain this girl. I wouldn't know what to do/say/where to go. Nothing. Any girl who incorporates ejaculating penises into her blog's logo is a girl I am not yet savvy enough for. Gimme six years. At that point I would pick her up in my hovercar. We should have those by then.

@jonnylieberman: Kudos on the HST reference.

Andrewpetty

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Citroen DS, bien sûr!

HoubaHouba!

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> I just went to the [onedatatime.typepad.com] site for shits and giggles;

You're not gonna believe what they want you to do on the first date.

Evander

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Easy: A '71 Dodge Valtrex

strayrod

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @clank-o-tron: Amen.

Jonny Lieberman

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> I'm from New York: she'll get a subway ride to the bar, a taxi home at 4am, and she'll like it.

Harry Pelotas

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Borrow? Are you kidding? Goth girls with questionable morals and a proclivity for needing to hide things in a trunk for a while or make a quick getaway is the reason I got an STI.

Well, one of the reasons.

clank-o-tron

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> '69 Superbird

Dr.Danger, I run the Death Star

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> That new Kia Fellatio.

...er, Borrego.

Sorry.

Roadster_Guy

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> A Kenworth K-900 with condo sleeper.

OR, the true classy route: 1971 Ranchero with inflatable mattress in the bed.

JayP71

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> A Uni(mog) to get to that nice, cozy cabin

jakay11

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> The Noam Chomsky van, assuming it has a hopped up SBC and mood lighting/mirrors over the (water?)bed.

contender is a high performance machine, so he had to be filled with premium

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> damm, tie down, not toe down.

clinto

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> '66 E-Type.

Brian E

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> An M35A2-lots of room in the bed for……activities and toe-down rings for the …….errr….cargo. Plus if you leave the engine running, no one will hear the screams.

clinto

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Okay, how 'bout a Mister Softie Ice Cream truck.

POLAЯMISSESEVEЯYBODY

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Easy, a hearse, laying down in the back is where she belongs.

M0L0TOV

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> A DAF 600 because I have nothing to prove.

JohnnyWagon

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @Ray Wert: Well with a name like Slut Machine, I figured I could pass on trying to be witty and just go for the gold! All in good fun big guy, no execution necessary. I'm breezy!

POLAЯMISSESEVEЯYBODY

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @DokterDitka: Polar, this is how it's done.

Jonny Lieberman

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> A tandem bicycle, to ensure she likes me for me, not my money.

rlj676-new job, same problems

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> If her name is supposed to imply that she's rather promiscuous to begin with then at least I won't have to drive something yellow.

no_slushbox

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> 997 Turbo convertible and the keys to someone's beach house.

Grib

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> The V8 Interceptor from The Road Warrior (the one with the external gas tanks and booby traps).

workingonyourinvoice

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> '83 Country Squire

DokterDitka

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> She's riding in my '70 E-Type. No doubt.

Spitfyr

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Is that a Gen 3 Camry Coupe? Classy :)

Heep

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Exelero.
Next question.

NICKNICK

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @POLAR: Hmm, that's a good way to get yourself added to a list of potential executions. At least make your sexism artful or witty. I mean, come on.

Ray Wert

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Kurt Russel's Dodge Charger from the movie Death Proof, or the Nova. Either one works. No possibility of road "pleasure" in the Nova with the roll cage and plexiglass though...

HeeeeyJake

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> @POLAR: Oh, this is not going to go well.

Jonny Lieberman

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Why take a car when I can just drive her?

POLAЯMISSESEVEЯYBODY

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Has Lindsey's SL65 sold yet?

Skydiver

]]> <![CDATA[Bonus: What Would You Drive on a Date with Jezebel's Slut Machine?]]> Heh, maybe y'all shouldn't have kicked all the four door cars out of the JFG. Maybe the Rambo Lambo would work then....

HDC

]]>