<![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus - Jalopnik Comments]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus - Jalopnik Comments]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> So they're now calling one jelly bean by the name of another jelly bean.

Nightwing

]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> Cruisin' downtown in your Camaro,
REO Speedwagon on the stereo.
It's kind of catchy, Kind of a virus,
Cutting your hair like Billy Ray Cyrus.
You're probably bummed, You probably cried,
You're probably sad that the guy from Lynrd Skynrd died,
You're probably singing "oh, oh, oh",
All night long.

Feel the power of the PHANTOM MULLET,
Tremble and cower from the PHANTOM MULLET,
White metal burn of the PHANTOM MULLET,
Combed straight or permed it's the PHANTOM MULLET,
And you, cutting it short on top,
I want that for me.
Growing it long in the back,
So savage and so free.

Drop into first you're taking it slow,
You're such a rock-star,
You could never know.
I wish I was singing, "oh, oh, oh",
All night long.

[thanks, Five Iron Frenzy]

combat chuck

]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> In the interest of stopping the confusion for all of us in middle America (wherever), call the sedan the "Taurus 500" and the crossover the "Taurus Freestyle." There, isn't everyone happy now?

Al in Texas

]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> nice mullet, very 80s. goes with the taurus

pirate

]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> http://www.mulletjunky.com/

allenparkpete

]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> It's sickening how Ford execs are gladhanding and patting each other on the proverbial asses just because some "marketing genius" had the great idea to change the "500" back to the "Taurus," like it was some sort of new and innovative marketing idea.

They should have just issued an apology to the general public.

Dear The Ford-Driving Middle-Class Citizens of North-America,

We're sorry that we undermined your collective intelligence by re-badging our 'Flag-Ship Sedan' and attempting to pass it off as a vehicle that we had hoped you'd believe was something special and actually worth a damn.

Now with the relaunch of the Taurus we wait with bated breath for your hard earned dollars to be spent on our pathetic FMC products (A and Z plan lessees should apply. Tax, title, and destination are extra).

We really do appreciate YOUR appreciation for the lackluster design and pitiful performance that has been incorporated into each and ever one of our vehicles since the 80s. We hope, with the contributions of your 'scrilla,' that one day our status will be returned to its former glory and we'll proudly stand in the limelight knowing that the recognition of being considered #3 will once again be ours... provided that we don't outfit our vehicles with any more exploding tires (we're still sorry about that one Explorer drivers).

Remember, here at Ford, Quality if Job #1, but we promise that we're still going to treat our, ahem, valuable customers like #2.

Sincerely,
Some Overpaid Ford Exec

And the Taurus being considered an automotive icon? I hope that was a joke. I really don't find a vanilla, run of the mill, rental *slash* fleet car to be considered "iconic."

Hell, Ford should have never changed the name to begin with because the name was never the problem.

MosH8ed

]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> If this asshole keeps ruining the mullet's image Chevy will never be able to bring back the El Camino.

no_slushbox

]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> Taurus X: This time, It's personal.

coming to theaters, Summer 2008.

dculberson

]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> Seth L:

Considering only 4 people actually know or care about the 500, the name won't be missed.

Just bring back the SHO

danio3834

]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> I'd like to see them bring back the SHO too. Thats one thing that might help out the new taurus. Something that could combat the Charger RT

RamV10

]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> Did FoMoCo have to sign a licensing deal with the estate of Malcolm X?

Hyman Decent

]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> Anyone give a shit? Anyone?

FishingCrue

]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> So they will confuse four people, danio3834?

And the Taurus X is the Freestyle rebadged?

RIP F-alliterative names, you will not be missed.

Seth L

]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> It isnt a horrbile idea, but they are just going to confuse unsuspecting customers who heard the Taurus dissapeared and are shopping for a Five Hundred.

The car needs an appropriate and recognized name, but Ford needs to be consistant.

Taurus X can be a feature vehicle on that crappy cable tv show, Mutant X. hahah

Brign back the SHO

danio3834

]]> <![CDATA[Ford's New Bull Is Official: Exit The Five Hundred, Enter The Taurus]]> That's too bad. Taurus makes me think of cheap ugly cars made by Ford. 500 at least had an image of speed and worthiness.

SpudMills

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