​This Report On Lexus' 600-HP Coupe Is Everything Wrong With Car Names

We all consider ourselves pretty fluent in the nomenclature of cars, so when I sat down to read Motor Trend's report on the forthcoming 600-hp Lexus LF-LC coupe, I didn't expect to need a double dose of Dramamine and an Ativan chaser.

It's not that the author, the esteemed Mr. Lieberman, wasn't able to parse through Lexus' insufferable naming conventions. But even a hardened car nerd would suffer an alphabet-soup-induced stroke starting with stuff like:

Word on the Tokyo street is that there's a Lexus LF-LC Coupe mule running around Japan packing a 600-hp twin-turbo version of the upcoming RC F's 5.0-liter V-8.

And going into this:

…our sources confirm the monstrous twin-turbo V-8 will be the SC F. There's a potent hybrid LF-LC/SC H whose powertrain will…

And then this:

Regardless, the new LS will look to take on the S63 AMG by also using the 600-hp twin-turbo V-8 in what will be called the LS F. You can expect the LS 600hL to return (probably as the LS H), with the same Bavarian-flavored hybrid setup found in the SC H.

Maybe broken up into digestible chunks makes it easier, but to read the entire report on Lexus' new coupe, sedan, high performance coupe, high performance sedan, hybrid sedan, hybrid coupe, high performance hybrid... it's enough to make someone's eyes glaze over before rolling back into their skull.

So here's the shorter, slightly more readable, bullet point version:

  • Lexus LF-LC Coupe will be called the SC
  • The base SC will get a naturally aspirated V8 with around 450 hp
  • The RC F is launching next month with a naturally aspirated V8
  • An SC-F and LS-F will pack the same engine (I think)
  • A 600-hp twin-turbo 5.0-liter V8 will be in the RC-FS
  • An LS H and SC H (H = hybrid) will come with a 500-hp engine likely sourced from BMW
  • A GS F will come with the RC F's naturally aspirated V8
  • And there's a possibility that Lexus' AMG, RS, and M competitors could carry the name 'FS'

Got it? If I screwed anything up, blame Lexus for making car names sound like algebra.