Man Named 'Shelby Mustang GT500' Arrested For Wielding Hatchet At Bar

You never want to fight another man in a bar unless you absolutely have to. But you don't ever want to fight a guy whose name happens to be "Shelby Mustang GT500," and you especially don't want to fight him if he has a hatchet.

Police in Des Moines, Iowa arrested Shelby Mustang GT500 Miller, 26, after they say he attacked several bar patrons with a hatchet, the Des Moines Register reports.

I cannot believe I just wrote that sentence. This is an actual thing that really happened. What an amazing country America is.

Officers say Miller got into an argument with another man at a sports bar just after 1 a.m. Thursday, but Miller said it was just a verbal dispute — even though Miller took his shirt off and "seemed ready to fight."

Two of Miller's friends volunteered to take him home, but he later returned with a hatchet under his shirt, the newspaper reports. He told police they "had the wrong guy" but never denied the hatchet was his.

Miller was charged with public intoxication, violating parole and going armed with intent. Why his given name is "Shelby Mustang GT500" was not revealed. He remains in jail.

Hat tip to John!