Dear GM, there is only one proper Cadillac left and it's the Escalade. You're debuting the 2015 Cadillac Escalade today. Here's why you can't screw it up.
The first tip-off that the Escalade is the last proper Cadillac is the name — everything else has devolved into some kind of 'I wish I was German' mess of pointless letters. It started when you turned the Deville and the Seville into the DTS and the STS. Now we have the CTS and the ATS, which mean nothing at all, and the SRX, which makes my brain hurt.
But the Escalade is still the Escalade, with a name that resolutely projects 'GET YOUR ASS OUT OF MY WAY I MAKE MORE MONEY THAN YOU' just as well as an Eldorado badge did back in the day.
Let me say that making your cars into welterweight wannabes seems to be working for you, Cadillac. The ATS and CTS are still making headlines, but what's good for your smaller sedans is not good for your last proper fullsizer.
Other than the limited-run CTS-V, the Escalade is the last Cadillac that burbles. It rumbles and roars the way that a proper Cadillac should, and it deserves styling that reflects this not-quite stately attitude.
I've been worried about this upcoming Escalade for a while now, GM. The second-generation model had such a perfect face. Even the last-generation model had that over-the-top character.
And let me tell you, the world wants that classic Cadillac feel. There's been a resurgence recently of old-school Caddy love, most notably from Macklemore's "White Walls." It's a better ad for Cadillac than most of your own work and it's up to over four and a half million views just on the strength of big, floaty Caddys of old.