For $79,995, Smoke 'Em If You’ve Got ‘Em

The Marlboro Man died of lung cancer, how's that for a non-ironic passing. Today's Nice Price or Crack Pipe Marlboro Syclone doesn't need a Surgeon General warning, but will its price still prove bad for the heart?

Do you have a collection of children's toys - say Star Wars action figures - that you keep in their original packages to maintain their value, despite your gnawing desire to rip out Leia and Chewie and force them into compromising positions together? That's sort of the vibe that was given off by yesterday's factory-fresh 1975 Honda Civic CVCC hatch, and in the biggest come from behind since Farrah Abraham's latest sex tape, it squeaked by with an RCH-close 50.1% Nice Price win once the voting was closed, by me.

That Honda may have been amazingly virginal, but if you happen to be attempting to not be, you're going to need a wingman, and what better than today's 1991 special ed Marlboro GMC Syclone to help you get lucky? I mean, just looking at it and my undies are on the floor.

For $79,995, Smoke 'Em If You’ve Got ‘Em

Now, we all know about the standard Syclone, which was GMC's little pickup that could. Rocking an advanced all-wheel drive system and powered by a 280-horse LB4 V6 rocking a turbo and intercooler-infused intake it was da bomb.

The Syclone lasted all of one year - 1991 - with just a dribble in '92 before the truck was cancelled and replaced by the SUV Typhoon, proving once again that SUVs ruin everything. In all fewer than 3,000 Syclones were built in '91, making them one of the most rare and desirable of GM's offerings from the decade. But what if that's not rare enough?

This 'Hot Licks' red Syclone is the rarest of the rare, being one of only ten trucks modded by American Sunroof Corporation, and given away as top prizes in the Marlboro Racing '92 contest. That means this 'Clone is about the least likely to see its clone on the road.

For $79,995, Smoke 'Em If You’ve Got ‘Em

Mods to the trucks included the aforementioned and salaciously named paint, which was a significant change from the stock Syclone's back in black hue. There's also the removable roof and drop-down back glass, both engineered and installed by ASC. Boyd Coddington wheels and lots of Marlboro logos adorn the outside, while inside there are leather-wrapped Recaros and a Momo wheel.

The Marlboro trucks weren't just show and no go as they also gained a PROMPaq chip and Borla exhaust. All of the visual changes were made under the guidance of Stingray designer Larry Shinoda, and, anybody who doesn't know his bona fides doesn't know shit from Shinoda.

For $79,995, Smoke 'Em If You’ve Got ‘Em

This one has 3,000 miles on the clock - not quite as impressive as yesterday's Honda, but notably low nonetheless. It's also described be the dealer as being in "far superior" condition to the other two Cigarette Syclones he has had the privilege of laying eyeballs upon.

That's a good thing because this is that unfortunate mix of GM high-tech content and age, which tend to conspire to make shit go bad, a lot. Hopefully this one isn't serving up just such a combo platter.

For $79,995, Smoke 'Em If You’ve Got ‘Em

A frequent retort to the appearance of such scarce rides as this is that rarity does not equate to desirability. I ould aver that even if this tobacco branded Syclone had been made in the thousands, it would still represent a high level of wantability, and in fact that the paucity of ownership opportunities are only the icing on the cake. Whatever your opinion on the matter, it's now time roll it all up and give a vote on this rare truck's $79,995 price tag.

That is not chicken feed - well, I guess it could be if you were feeding like a Chinese provence's worth or chickens, but you get my meaning. When it comes to cars, that amount would buy a lot of competitors, including a number that would be likely to appreciate in value in the same manner as this Syclone might. What do you think about $79,995 for this Marlboro truck? Is that a deal for this special edition? Or, at that much would you rather have a Camel?

You decide!

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H/T to Sean Lamphere for the hookup!

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