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Detroit, 3:49 AM
Tue Dec 1
29 posts in the last 24 hours

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Kuro Kuro
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    It's people like this that make violence so tempting. I'll go with "Maglite to the forehead." Any other suggestions? #bmwx5
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom promoted this comment Kuro was starred Kuro was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    10/27/09

    @Kuro: Ahh, yes, the Rodney King Special. Me, I'd use a crowbar. #bmwx5
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of LandofMinos, cast thou evil bum dragger to thy scrapyard LandofMinos, cast thou evil bum dragger to thy scrapyard
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    Wow this just puts limitation to the totally spotless reputation of BMW drivers everywhere. #bmwx5
     Reply
    LandofMinos, cast thou evil bum dragger to thy scrapyard was starred LandofMinos, cast thou evil bum dragger to thy scrapyard was unstarred
    Image of skierpage skierpage
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    Right now one of bmwusa.com's front-page movies is
    "The M's 555 horses. Caged in the spacious body of the X. Introducing the all-new BMW X5 M and X6 M.
    For you to poop on lesser drivers."

    Presumably the M's unintended acceleration would launch you clear out of the parking lot, saving the stress of reversing away from your fails. #bmwx5
     Reply
    skierpage was starred skierpage was unstarred
    Image of YankBoffin YankBoffin
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    Well, since it's a likely a member, it should be possible to identify the owner based on past visit surveillance footage, check-in logs, etc. #bmwx5
     Reply
    YankBoffin was starred YankBoffin was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    An Elantra? A Neon? C'mon, car gods. Put a Venza there next time. Thank you. #bmwx5
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est
    10/27/09

    @MushyHeirloom: No, but another X5 will do just fine. #bmwx5
     Reply
    Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est was starred Mr.choppers - Delenda Carthago Est was unstarred
    Image of mytdawg mytdawg
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    I am heading to the gym in 26 minutes!

    [gawker.com] #bmwx5
     Reply
    mytdawg was starred mytdawg was unstarred
    Image of Scooter McGee, Esq. Scooter McGee, Esq.
    10/26/09

    @mytdawg: Came here to say this. Glad to see someone beat me to it. #bmwx5
     Reply
    mytdawg promoted this comment Scooter McGee, Esq. was starred Scooter McGee, Esq. was unstarred
    Image of mytdawg mytdawg
    10/26/09

    @Scooter McGee, Esq.: For some reason jackasses seem to be attracted to gyms and country clubs like moths to a flame. It's like a competition to see who can park closest to the door so they don't have to walk in order to "exercise". People just suck in general. #bmwx5
     Reply
    mytdawg was starred mytdawg was unstarred
    Image of skierpage skierpage
    10/26/09

    @mytdawg: I feel sorry for people who drive a 4000 pound car to the gym to then pedal an exercise bike or run on a treadmill for 20 minutes. Bike or jog down side streets to the gym! It's good for you, the environment, your time, the neighborhood, your soul. #bmwx5
     Reply
    skierpage was starred skierpage was unstarred
    Image of beercheck beercheck
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    Time to modify my ebay listing for zip ties. #bmwx5
     Reply
    beercheck was starred beercheck was unstarred
    Image of Alfisted Alfisted
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    asstuque #bmwx5
     Reply
    Alfisted was starred Alfisted was unstarred
    Image of tempesjo tempesjo
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    For Sale: 2004 Hynudai Elantra Hatchback. Well-maintained, but not obsessively babied, so it has a couple of parking lot door dings and one parking lot hood rut. Best offer. #bmwx5
     Reply
    tempesjo was starred tempesjo was unstarred
    Image of zeeboid zeeboid
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    shouldn't this be in the "Why people think BMW Drivers are Asshats" Section? #bmwx5
     Reply
    zeeboid was starred zeeboid was unstarred
    Image of Foxieness Foxieness
    10/26/09

    @zeeboid: I'm seconding this suggestion.

    If anyone ever wanted to know why I hate SUV's, this would be it. Especially BMW's SUVs. I'm shocked if I ever see one driving courteously, as I think that's a violation of some sort of agreement they get you to sign when you agree to be a moron and lease a car you can hardly afford.

    Okay, maybe that was a bit much, but you get my point. (No, it doesn't apply to everyone, but no self-respecting car person would buy this sort of BMW anyhow. Not when there's the M3 & M5.) #bmwx5
     Reply
    skierpage promoted this comment Foxieness was starred Foxieness was unstarred
    Image of skierpage skierpage
    10/26/09

    @Foxieness: Subhumans have appeared on Jalopnik who genuinely believe their X3 or X5 is teh ultimate! driving machine in handling and snow. They usually STFU when asked if they compared their fat tall overweight monstrosity back-to-back with a 328i xDrive or 535i xDrive on similar tires. #bmwx5
     Reply
    skierpage was starred skierpage was unstarred
    Image of RayonFog RayonFog
    10/27/09

    @Foxieness: I'm fairly new to these pages, so I really don't understand the BMW hate here yet.

    I am a self-respecting car person, and my wife and I drive a diesel X5 and a M3, respectively. Before the X5, my wife drove a series of Volvo XC wagons, BMW X-Drives and one tricked-out, flame-on black Honda Odyssey (yes, I'm saying that with a straight face).

    We drive courteously (my wife more so than me), and I can say without a doubt that it's the drivers of the 1) Explorers, and 2) any Benz and Range Rover SUV's, who take the prize for "Non-Courteous Driving", at least where I grew up and live near Lake Tahoe.

    Yes, I agree that this X5 driver and the Canadian dude who fuels up on the wrong side both suffer from AssHat Syndrome, but they don't represent every fan of the roundel. Ever drive in Glendale, CA? No make or model is immune from AHS.

    My first thought after seeing this video was that the X5 came out of it pretty well!

    I'm a huge fan of the diesel X5, am not ashamed to say it, and will defend it to the bitter end! (@skierpage below, yes, even against the 535xi we previously owned. I'm sure you'll agree that it's not what you drive in the snow, it's how you drive it. I drove my Datsun 240Z to my college job at Boreal for 4 winters, including the 1989 blizzards. But I guess I must be "subhuman", so please disregard)

    And BTW, I ride my bike to the gym, but will never, ever join a country club. #bmwx5
     Reply
    skierpage promoted this comment RayonFog was starred RayonFog was unstarred
    Image of Foxieness Foxieness
    10/27/09

    @RayonFog: Yeah, but *you* drive the M3.... She has the SUV. Why an SUV? Yes, BMW has great diesel technology, it isn't as bad as a Chevy/Ford/etc, yadda yadda yadda.... But *why* an SUV?

    I don't care if people see them as necessary, I just don't understand WHY someone has to have a huge, horribly-handling SUV to tote around his or herself and the rare passenger(s). Many sedans have just as much space, but without the high center of gravity and height. Or the inflated price tag for a land yacht.

    Believe me, I don't just pick on BMW SUV's. I hate all SUV's equally. I personally will never, ever own one. (I find it horrible that women feel they are necessary, even worse when they cite "safety" as a reason for it when they are NOT safer than most cars.) #bmwx5
     Reply
    Foxieness was starred Foxieness was unstarred
    Image of skierpage skierpage
    10/27/09

    @RayonFog: I'm glad your SUV is working out for you, though it sounds like a European MPV without the weight and "commanding road presence" crap would work. But they're not available in the USA and even in Europe luxury buyers demand heft. :-(

    I'm surrounded in Lake Tahoe by large families with tons of snow equipment, a hulking SUV is the right car for them. The issue is whether you believe the X5 handles better than the current 5 series with xDrive on comparable tires. Oh the subhumanity! #bmwx5
     Reply
    skierpage was starred skierpage was unstarred
    Image of RayonFog RayonFog
    10/28/09

    @skierpage: It remains to be seen as we haven't really had our first snow yet and we only just got the X5 this past summer (though I hear Kingsbury is getting some flurries tonight - come on, baby!).

    Agreed, I LOVED our previous xDrive 5-series (2006), but as I said, it slowly became impractical for our needs. #bmwx5
     Reply
    RayonFog was starred RayonFog was unstarred
    Image of Pessimippopotamus Pessimippopotamus
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    That person needs a serious help from this lady. #bmwx5
     Reply
    Pessimippopotamus was starred Pessimippopotamus was unstarred
    Image of that ain't the way to have fun, son that ain't the way to have fun, son
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    Extreme Fitness need to change their name to Extreme Douchiness.

    The driver was practicing for the leg press machine.

    BTW, this is the most 'off-road' this "SUV" will ever see.

    Quick, someone call the Canadia CSI! They can trace the tire tracks!

    /repetitive eye-rolling
     Reply
    Edited by that ain't the way to have fun, son at 10/26/09 1:51 PM that ain't the way to have fun, son was starred that ain't the way to have fun, son was unstarred
    Image of Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig)
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    Speaking of BMW parking lot failures, I saw my first X6 at Lowe's yesterday.

    My god, it was worse than the pics. Especially from the rear. #bmwx5
     Reply
    Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was starred Das ASHloch (achtundsiebzig) was unstarred
    Image of AmishJohn AmishJohn
    10/26/09

    @Ash78 ain't got time to bleed: It looks like a poseur Tribeca, don't it? #bmwx5
     Reply
    AmishJohn was starred AmishJohn was unstarred
    Image of Alfisted Alfisted
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    I find it hard to believe a BMW driver would behave that way. #bmwx5
     Reply
    Alfisted was starred Alfisted was unstarred
    Image of two wheels are enough two wheels are enough
    10/26/09

    In reply to BMW X5 Driver Crushes Cars, Drives Away
    And here I was, thinking that the X5 had absolutely no off-road capability whatsoever... I think Jeep just found some rock-crawler competition. #bmwx5
     Reply
    FTGDWolverineEdition'09 promoted this comment two wheels are enough was starred two wheels are enough was unstarred
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