Welcome to Used Car Face Off, where we find two similar or similarly priced used cars and ask you which one you would buy. Choose wisely!

We definitely dream of classic rear-wheel-drive German sedans. A lot of these just-within-reach Teutonic fantasies hinge on pulling sweeping drifts when the snow falls. That's exactly what these reggae-powered Swedish hoons are up to.

When it came time to advertise the struggling 5000 model for 1987, Audi decided to take the road less traveled. That road wound itself around a Mercedes and BMW in a circular fashion, creating a vintage advertisement that hasn't aged any better than most Audi 5000s.

Thanks to feature bloat and nanny state safety regulations, cars continue to expand as fast as American waistlines. Still don't believe us? Look at this seven-generation Mercedes E-Class family picture. My, what a fat ass you have, W211. [via Blaaargh]

All right, maybe you couldn't build a fine race car like the Son Of A Blitzen '86 300E LeMons car, but even the LeMons Supreme Court believes the legitimacy of the team's budget claims.

The Mercedes Benz E-Class W124 is the placeholder in our minds eye for what Mercedes Benz's should be. Boxy, classy, high-quality, and above all, restrained. This customized Russian W124 is anything but.

OK, so 78% of our readers believe the restomodded Volvo P1800S is overpriced at $69,900. We can see that, but we're going to present you with a much tougher call today: a gen-yoo-wine, low-mile Hammer!