Jalopnik: truck nutz

Donked AMC Hornet Sportabout Sports Hella Bass, Truck Nutz

Murilee Martin — Sat, 09 May 2009 10:30:00 EDT

Normally, we wouldn't recommend adding big ol' donkin' wheels, JC Whitney leaf-spring shackles, and Truck Nutz to a Malaise Era wagon. However, this combo works perfectly on a primered '76 Hornet Sportabout!

TheEastBayKid spotted this fine machine not far from 24 Hours Of LeMons Headquarters, in the former bootlegging capitol of Northern California, Emeryville. As befits an Oakland native, TheEastBayKid describes this Kenosha wagon as having "hella bass." We certainly hope so!

Buy Dale Earnhardt, Jr's Nuts!

Andrew Didorosi — Fri, 06 Feb 2009 15:00:00 EST

Fresh nuts! Get 'em while they're hot! You can own the greatest NASCAR collectors item since this piece of roundy-round merchandising.

Only in Ohio would you find someone trying to off a set of used nuts. Well, the Carolinas are pretty backwoods. And then there's Texas.

Imagine how frantically he was grabbing at those nuts, thinking he hit the big time. Must've looked a lot like the slower kids nabbing at the last pieces of candy with their grubby little fingers.

Since it's all in caps, you know he's damn serious.

DALE JRS LUGNUTS - $45 (NILES OHIO)

I HAVE 30 OF DALE JRS LUGNUTS FROM THE FALL RACE AT MARTINSVILLE. I DONT KNOW IF THEY HAVE A VALUE SO PRICE IS NEGOTIABLE. THESE ARE NOT FAKES!!!! I GOT THEM MYSELF FROM JRS PITBOX AFTER THE RACE! 330-501-6465

Photo Credit: Photo by Jason Smith/Getty Images for NASCAR

[Craigslist via Motive]

Corn-Nuts Anyone?

Ray Wert — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 23:06:32 EST

Jon Stewart's upped the ante on "Truck Nuts" tonight, which makes us want to ask you to caption this photo of Jon and the benutted cob o' corn up there.

How To Rebuild The Republican Party: Truck Nutz For All!

Murilee Martin — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 16:00:00 EST

With the RNC licking its wounds and contemplating strategies that will help them win back lost political ground, it only makes sense that they'd turn to this here newfangled internet thingy to try to get some ideas. The folks at Rebuild The Party decided to seek reader input to finish the statement "The next RNC Chairman should…" and (as of the time of this writing) the answer "Give all Red Blooded Americans a pair of Truck Nutz for their F150s!" is leading by a landslide, crushing a bunch of confusing eggheaded ideas about the Bill Of Rights and fiscal policy. Oh, sure, some might call it Truck Nutz Socialism, but drastic measures are needed!

[Rebuild The Party, via Wonkette; go here if page disappears]

BrakeNutz. Yeah, You Read That Right, Brake... Nutz.

Ben Wojdyla — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 16:30:00 EDT

Let's say you're looking for a way to spice up the tail-end of pickup truck and regular truck nutz just don't do it for you. Perhaps something more tasteful and yet more flashy — literally. Enter BrakeNutz, a clear set of polycarbonate Nutz with dual-element LEDs inside. Those strategically placed lights are wired to mimic brake lights when properly installed into your cars or trucks wire harness. Guess that's one way to legally flash your nutz at someone. [BrakeNutz]

Would Car Nutz Customs Be Illegal In Florida?

Ben Wojdyla — Fri, 09 May 2008 15:40:00 EDT

With all the hullabaloo over Truck Nutz it's a wonder the folks at Car Nutz Customs haven't taken a cue and changed their name a bit. True, they don't specialize at installing chrome dangly bits on '71 Impalas, but with Florida legislators rebelling against all things Nutz, you'd think they might just consider it. That being said, Car Nutz Customs (CNC in brief) actually does some nice work if you're into the whole big rims and crazy stereo with a clean install kind of thing. Unfortunately they aren't into big pictures of their cars. Enjoy the tiiiiiiny gallery of their work.

Truck Nutz Now Fineable In Florida, One State Senator Admits Guilt

Travis Hudson — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 16:40:00 EDT

The infamous Truck Nutz have now been deemed illegal in Florida and are punishable with a measly $60 fine. If you remember, Virginia was working on enacting a similar bill that would make displaying the genitals a misdemeanor punishable with a $250 fine. What makes this even funnier is what some of Florida's senators had to say about the matter, including an admission of guilt by one.

Sen. Jim King, R-Jacksonville, said he had a set on one of his vehicles, which he described as "all pimped out." They are no more than "an expression of truckliness," he said, although he'd acceded to his wife's request to take them off.

Another senator also weighed in on the matters.

"I find it shocking we'd tell people with metallic testicles on their bumpers that this is a violation," said Sen. Steve Geller, D-Hallandale. "There's got to be better things for us to spend time debating."

Ban or not, we're still finding it hilarious that a "prestigious" Florida senator has the, ahem, testicular fortitude to admit that he himself has a set. Florida citizens, do you really want to be represented by a truck nutter? We guess it beats other Florida Republican state legislators, at least he didn't offer a cop $20 to play with his truck nuts in a park bathroom. [Florida Capital News]