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Detroit, 11:49 PM
Mon Dec 7
30 posts in the last 24 hours

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  • posts about #trafficconemonster more →

    The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of Novaload Novaload
    06/04/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    Hey, I haven't seen one of these since the 70s. Seriously, they used to come out after dark, mostly--nocturnal but attracted to light, I think, like big shiny reflective moths. Only mostly they didn't fly. They mostly waved and tried to lure you to the side of the road but we were too smart for that. Some of them could talk, though. I used to hate that.

    I thought they were all extinct. Wow, what a flashback.
     Reply
    Novaload was starred Novaload was unstarred
    Image of KTown_WhiteBoy KTown_WhiteBoy
    06/04/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    This HAS to be in Tennessee, Big Orange [Barrel] Country. I'm fairly certain all of our politicians have stock in whatever company(ies) make these damn things.
     Reply
    KTown_WhiteBoy was starred KTown_WhiteBoy was unstarred
    Image of Elhigh Elhigh
    06/04/09

    @KTown_WhiteBoy: Considering how many there are on I40, you'd think there has to be enough of a gene pool for something like this to evolve eventually.
     Reply
    Elhigh was starred Elhigh was unstarred
    Image of bdon bdon
    06/03/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    I wanted to be like ken block, So I am out there doing donuts in a 90hp subaru and ya know what happened?I ran right into oneof those barrels sideways, car kicked it like a football. If that monster was there, I surely would have ran home quite frightened.
     Reply
    bdon was starred bdon was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    06/03/09

    @bdon: That made sense. Was the car okay? My mother clipped a cone with her then-new Contour and put a nice little dent in the door.
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of dwegmull comments for the purpose of obscurity dwegmull comments for the purpose of obscurity
    06/03/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    This is more fun than a barrel of... Barrels!
     Reply
    dwegmull comments for the purpose of obscurity was starred dwegmull comments for the purpose of obscurity was unstarred
    Image of LandofMinos, cast thou evil bum dragger to thy scrapyard LandofMinos, cast thou evil bum dragger to thy scrapyard
    06/03/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    TBM hates...


    -Boy Racers (inc Boy Ricers)

    -Oblivious blonds in convertibles

    -Highway patrol

    -Rich kids in supercars

    -Truck nuts on Hyundais

    -Neon lights under Hyundais

    -Hyundais

    -Anyone from Fresno, Bakersfield and all of Florida

    -Drivers with hats (inc elderly in cloth sun-hats, try-hard hoods in baseball caps)

    -Hyundais

    -Closet homosexual Fred Phelps (Google that shit)

    -Speed cameras

    -Burberry® (sorry Wert it's TBM not me)

    -OPEC

     Reply
    LandofMinos, cast thou evil bum dragger to thy scrapyard was starred LandofMinos, cast thou evil bum dragger to thy scrapyard was unstarred
    Image of SeanKHotay SeanKHotay
    06/03/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    Only YOU can prevent CarBQs...
     Reply
    SeanKHotay was starred SeanKHotay was unstarred
    Image of Starlton Heston's Revenge Starlton Heston's Revenge
    06/03/09

    @SeanKHotay: well played!
     Reply
    Starlton Heston's Revenge was starred Starlton Heston's Revenge was unstarred
    Image of HammSammich HammSammich
    06/03/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    What a Conehead!
     Reply
    HammSammich was starred HammSammich was unstarred
    Image of HammSammich HammSammich
    06/03/09

    @HammSammich: Thank you, thank you, I'll be performing here all week. Drive safely, and don't forget to tip your waitress.
     Reply
    HammSammich was starred HammSammich was unstarred
    Image of günter macbeetle, codename: chrystlubitshi günter macbeetle, codename: chrystlubitshi
    06/03/09

    @HammSammich: you forgot 'try the veal!'
     Reply
    günter macbeetle, codename: chrystlubitshi was starred günter macbeetle, codename: chrystlubitshi was unstarred
    Image of Cognitive Friction Cognitive Friction
    06/03/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    This is a really efficient way to catch any drivers who might be high/stoned - just have a tow truck handy to pull them out of the ditch after they FREAK THE FUCK OUT and fly off the road in a blind panic
     Reply
    Cognitive Friction was starred Cognitive Friction was unstarred
    Image of Jo Schmo Jo Schmo
    06/03/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    From the creators of Sexual Harrassment Panda...
     Reply
    Jo Schmo was starred Jo Schmo was unstarred
    Image of BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯΤЄЯ BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯΤЄЯ
    06/03/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    GET OUT OF THIS LANE OR WE EAT YOU!!!
     Reply
    BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯΤЄЯ was starred BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯΤЄЯ was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    06/03/09

    @BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯΤЄЯ: Okay, so it's Cyclops-Spongebob dragoning a... is that a Volvo S40?
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of Vintage Racer - with V-12 goodness Vintage Racer - with V-12 goodness
    06/03/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    I know how to fix the guy... I just need an airbag and a skateboard....
     Reply
    Vintage Racer - with V-12 goodness was starred Vintage Racer - with V-12 goodness was unstarred
    Image of leavethegun-takethecannoli leavethegun-takethecannoli
    06/03/09

    @Vintage Racer needs a new schtick....: +1
     Reply
    leavethegun-takethecannoli was starred leavethegun-takethecannoli was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    06/03/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    OH SHI-
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    06/03/09

    @Lo! Loveseats, friend of Xrays: That is a link, and it is awesome.
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of Jo Schmo Jo Schmo
    06/03/09

    @Lo! Loveseats, friend of Xrays: +1,000,000
     Reply
    Jo Schmo was starred Jo Schmo was unstarred
    Image of .357 .357
    06/03/09

    @Lo! Loveseats, friend of Xrays: not awesome, but Fucking Awesome!
     Reply
    .357 was starred .357 was unstarred
    Image of leavethegun-takethecannoli leavethegun-takethecannoli
    06/03/09

    @Lo! Loveseats, friend of Xrays:That's pretty funny.
     Reply
    leavethegun-takethecannoli was starred leavethegun-takethecannoli was unstarred
    Image of Scandinavian Flick Scandinavian Flick
    06/03/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    Every time you masturbate, God kills a Miata.


    Please think of the Miatas.

     Reply
    Scandinavian Flick was starred Scandinavian Flick was unstarred
    Image of Deartháir II Deartháir II
    06/03/09

    @Scandinavian Flick: I am thinking of the Miata.


    (Well, okay, the hot blonde who was driving it...)

     Reply
    Deartháir II was starred Deartháir II was unstarred
    Image of domino domino
    06/03/09

    @Scandinavian Flick: i've been single for a decade, there should be no miatas on the face of the earth by my calculations.
     Reply
    domino was starred domino was unstarred
    Image of günter macbeetle, codename: chrystlubitshi günter macbeetle, codename: chrystlubitshi
    06/03/09

    @domino: i will help you bring them back 'in to the black' (as the accountant me would say)....
     Reply
    günter macbeetle, codename: chrystlubitshi was starred günter macbeetle, codename: chrystlubitshi was unstarred
    Image of Boost that bitch! Boost that bitch!
    06/03/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    Hmm a new challenger approaches. I will win this fight Traffic Barrel Monster, just like I killed your father, the Traffic Cone Beast.
     Reply
    Boost that bitch! was starred Boost that bitch! was unstarred
    Image of .357 .357
    06/03/09

    @doctor 1 penny: A new Challenger approaches. It is Heavy and Orange.
     Reply
    .357 was starred .357 was unstarred
    Image of Jo Schmo Jo Schmo
    06/03/09

    @.357-Wingman of Syrax: thats mostly from the wheel weights
     Reply
    Jo Schmo was starred Jo Schmo was unstarred
    Image of Plecostomus [Tyrrell] Plecostomus [Tyrrell]
    06/03/09

    @.357-Wingman of Syrax: Fuck, has it really taken me this long to heartclick you?
     Reply
    Plecostomus [Tyrrell] was starred Plecostomus [Tyrrell] was unstarred
    Image of günter macbeetle, codename: chrystlubitshi günter macbeetle, codename: chrystlubitshi
    06/03/09

    @Plecostomus needs GALVANIZED SCREWS: why have you not been heart-clikied™?? your name alone deserves it.... damned work... keeping from my jalopnikiness
     Reply
    günter macbeetle, codename: chrystlubitshi was starred günter macbeetle, codename: chrystlubitshi was unstarred
    Image of MushyHeirloom MushyHeirloom
    06/03/09

    @.357-Wingman of Syrax:
     Reply
    MushyHeirloom was starred MushyHeirloom was unstarred
    Image of bzr bzr
    06/03/09

    In reply to The Traffic Barrel Monster Will Eat You And Your Car
    HEY! THERE'S SLOW CHILDREN HERE, DAMMIT!
     Reply
    bzr was starred bzr was unstarred
    Image of Mad_Science Mad_Science
    06/03/09

    @bzr loves a Chinese Hummer (long time?): There are slow children here, dammit.
     Reply
    Mad_Science was starred Mad_Science was unstarred
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